New High School Romance Novel YOUNG LOVE

Author: Dean Amory

Tags: young romance, first love, young love, teenage romance, teenage love, coming of age, new adult, young adult, romance, novel,

In “Young Love part 1, A school Yard Love Story”, we witnessed how Sean and Katherine fell in love the first day they met. But Katherine broke up when she got afraid that things became too serious, and risked to disrupt her studies and the good understanding with her parents.

For Sean, being dumped was hard enough, but things became really complicated when Katherine  promised she would return to him after they graduated from high school.  Unfortunately, his heart was broken and he never believed love is something one can switch off and on deliberately. After trying for months to convince Katherine to reconsider, Sean gave up.  But with Katherine always nearby, he never really managed to distance himself from her. 

The sequel “Young Love Part 2, First Love’s Shadow”, starts at the beginning of the summer holiday.  Sean has acceted a holiday job at a hotel in the seaside resort Ostend.  He tries to move on. It’s difficult though to forget about Katherine, when so many of the issues he experiences in his new relationships look almost identical to what he went through before with her. Since this can hardly be coincidence, Sean starts questioning himself and the rules he’s always lived by.

At the start of their last year at school, Sean and Katherine discover that it’s not always simple to spend most active hours of every day in the same classroom with your ex.  Someone you loved and adored with all of your being and with whom it’s still easy to talk because they know and  understand you.  After some time, Katherine invites Sean to date again. Will they lay their hearts on the line again? Are second chances really possible? Can recreating the past help the young couple to create a different future?  And is Sean even willing to accept the terms Katherine's offer comes with?

About Young Love, part 2: "First Love's Shadow"

Dean Amory, author of the critically acclaimed coming of age novel “Young Love, A Schoolyard Love Story”, returns with a poignant, striking sequel that skilfully captures the singular experience of being a teenager: “Young Love, First Love’s Shadow”.

Dean Amory chronicles the hero’s life through the thrills, heartbreaks, joy and despair of the final year in high school and the consecutive transition to a work environment.  After the traumatic end of the school year, Sean leaves for the Flemish seaside resort Ostend, where he will work at hotel Brabant during the summer holiday.  Away from Katherine, he opens up again, meets new people and falls in love again but past experiences are haunting him and he must face some hard truths about himself.  Torn between old dreams and new hopes, he questions himself and the rules he’s always lived by.  By the time he returns home after the summer holiday, he feels reborn and ready to face the world.

But is he also ready to face Katherine? When she broke up, she had a simple plan: put studies before love and return to Sean after graduating from high school only.  Seeing how Sean has distanced himself from her, she realizes she is running the risk of losing him completely and invites him to reunite with her until the end of the school year, at which point she wants to re evaluate her life. 

Are second chances really possible? Can recreating the past help the young couple to create a different future?  And is Sean even willing to accept her terms?

In this imaginative, surprising and complex page-turner, which will certainly appeal to all fans of young adult and new adult romance novels, Dean Amory has brought a vivid, clever and heartfelt portrayal of what it’s like to be a teenager in love. "Young Love Part 2, First Love's Shadow" is a gripping story in which the distance between lost and found is often less than a text line long.

Some Comments: 

Great writing!  Could not stop reading!!

When I first picked up this book I wasn't all that sure I would like it, but I was pleasantly surprised when I read it. Now I can say with complete honesty that I enjoyed the story very much and am so glad I picked it! The story drew me in and I felt all the joy and all the pain.  It was intelligent and well developed and the dynamic between the main characters was great. 

I really enjoyed the characters. The characters are very well written: they have substance, and are unique without ever being overdone.  The author didn't go over the top with unrealistic scenes, though sometimes I became frustrated with Sean and even yelled at him once or twice. He took his time and you felt him struggle with his feelings. 

I was a little sad at some times and even cried at one point.  His heartbreak over losing Katherine was really sad.  I was left with a little bit of hmmmm a hang.

All in all it was a sweet read and wish this author only success with many more to come.

Total recommend for someone who's looking for a really good, original romance novel.

(Nele)

I usually dont leave reviews, but this book was TOO good not to.  This is an incredible book that you will not regret reading.  The story really caught me up in it. It had me hooked within minutes and I couldn't put it down! 

 I love this type of stories because they give you that feeling of first love discovery and transport you back to the days of high school and the emotional highs and lows of young love. 

 The book is very well written and unique because it takes the boy's point of view, which is rather unusual for a romance.  Also, it isn't as superficial as most romance stories: you really get to know the main characters very well. Especially Sean of course. To me, it was unexpected who he ended up with. Throughout the book, I kept hoping Sean and Katherine would come together in the end, after they finished school. After all, they loved each other, had known each other for years and had always been there for each other, even when they were not so close.I can honestly say that my feelings were hurt when they did not, even though they probably made the best choice for themselves.

I hope the author will consider publishing the book with an alternate ending with Sean picking Katherine, after they finally realize they've been each other's true love all along! 

Definitely recommend this book. I will be buying other books by this author. 

(Megan)

I'm so glad to have come across this book! This truly is a gem!  I have absolutely enjoyed reading it!  I fell in love with the characters right away and felt as if I were in high school right along beside them.  They are totally realistic and relatable.

I loved the special bond Sean and Katherine shared.

The story had me go through a roller coaster of emotions.  The plot line was sweet and endearing but also honest and never too sappy! Even though Sean's heart gets broken along the way, he refuses to settle for anything less than true love. I'm so glad for the silver lined cloud in the end. 

The story is paced evenly throughout the book with no huge time jumps or overworking of parts. I would definitely recommend you purchase this book. You will not be disappointed! 

(Sharon)

Wow, I loved this book!  Really amazing!  This book contains a well thought story plot.  The characters are genuine, and their decisions easy to understand.

Sean's personal struggle adds just enough drama, but I most of all adored Katherine.  Unlike Sean, she does not allow her hormones to rule her life and fights for what she knows is right, even if this means that she has to suffer a lot. 

I absolutely loved this book!

(Caroline)

Wonderful book. I literally just finished it and am sitting here a little stunned by how much I liked it.  I absolutely loved this story! It had me smiling, made me feel sad, even crying and on edge.  I was amazed at how well written it was.  The book is easy to understand, but also very different to the usual superficial falling-in-and-out-of-love kind of teen romance.  I loved it!

From the beginning I felt a connection with Sean. 

This is definitely one of the better young adult romance novels I have read in a long time! 

Anybody who loves a great teen romance should definitely read this book.

(Madelyn)

Wow, "Young Love" is absolutely awesome and I really enjoyed reading it.

I don't usually read young adult books because I thought they are too juvenile for me.  But I decided to give it a shot anyway.  After reading Young Love, I am persuaded otherwise!  The story captivated me from the start. I realy liked this book. It was so full of emotions that it overwhelmed me sometimes.

The story is good and it's well-written. I was able to connect to the characters and feel the emotion they were going through.  I started reading it last night and couldn't put it down anymore.  I finished it about 15 minutes ago. 

My emotions were everywhere! The book reminds me of my own life story.

I appreciated the honesty with which the author describes Sean's personal struggle.

The boy took my heart away just because he's not perfect or fake, but one hundred percent authentic.  And Katherine was so strong!  Doing the right thing all the time even though she knew it would cause her pain.  

(Abigail)

Young Love is available at:

Lulu.com

http://www.lulu.com/shop/dean-amory/young-love-part-1-a-school-yard-love-story/paperback/product-22211969.html

Amazon.com  (also Amazon Fr, De, Uk ...)

http://www.amazon.com/Young-Love-Part-School-Story/dp/1514332035/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1434526760&sr=8-1&keywords=dean+amory+young+love

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Young-Love-Part-School-Story/dp/1514332035/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1434526665&sr=8-2&keywords=dean+amory

Barnes and Noble

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/young-love-part-1-mr-dean-amory/1122130623?ean=9781514332030

ShopmyBooks

http://www.shopmybooks.com/IE/es/book/dean-amorydean-amory/young-love-part-1-school-yard-love-story

Smashwords

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/550243

More about Young Love

There is something endearing and innocent about young love; it’s irresistible. 

Here are two unconventional young adult romance novels with a unique rhythm that echoes the cadence and energy of youth, and a wonderful underlying pulse that quickly captures your imagination.  

YOUNG LOVE is a unique and welcome look at love and romance from the young man’s perspective. It looks at first love in diverse and unconventional ways, which is what we need in young adult novels today: 

YOUNG LOVE Part 1, A School Yard Love Story, follows Sean as he meets the smart and witty Katherine on the first day of the new school year.  

Although Katherine questions what his true intentions are, and doesn't always like his behaviour, she cannot help falling in love with him. But when their relationship threatens to ruin her studies and the understanding at home, she breaks up.

When he discovers that Katherine cannot shake him from her mind, Sean struggles to live up to her expectations and restore their bond. In the process, he is forced to have a good look at himself and to discover his own identity.  Slowly, he finds that it’s okay not to have all the answers.

In Young Love Part 2, First Love's Shadow, we follow the two during their last year at highschool. During a two month holiday job at a seaside resort, Sean has managed to distance himself from Katherine.  After the return to school however, Katherine realizes she's about to lose him for ever and invites him to reunite.  But her invitation comes with a condition.

Will they lay their hearts on the line again? Are second chances really possible? Can recreating the past help the young couple to create a different future?  And is Sean even willing to accept the terms Katherine's offer comes with?

If you’re looking for a great contemporary romance check out YOUNG LOVE.

YOUNG LOVE  is a wonderful contemporary romance.  Dean Amory does an excellent job at at giving us humor and characters that have depth, and portraying love, heartbreak and fate in this great coming-of-age story.  He gives us the thoughts and musings of young adults, and shows us that in a world seemingly without a cure, there is always hope in one form or another.

Dean Amory is a master at writing characters that come alive on the page.  The emotional tension between Sean and Katherine  is beautifully written. You really get a good sense of what both characters are feeling.   The sweetness of young love.  The anguish of regret. The sadness of time lost.   Not only did I fall in love with Sean and Katherine, but I really enjoyed watching Sean struggle to become the person he wanted to be and remain honest and consequent, even when his decisions came with an obvious cost..

I don’t know about you, but I totally love high school romance stories, especially when they involve young people trying to become the best they can.  I highly recommend this book.   It’s a wonderful read, and it leaves you with a sigh and a smile.  

17-06-2015 om 10:39 geschreven door Adrian

17-05-2015 om 15:55 geschreven door Adrian

‘Omdat Ik Vlaming Ben' -  Eddy Adriaens

‘Omdat ik Vlaming ben’ is een sociale aanklacht, weliswaar met humor verzacht. Het is een politiek manifest, geschreven met een gevoel van mededogen en in de wetenschap dat de ‘vijand’ in elk van ons loert. Maar het is vooral het ontroerende verhaal van Florine, die liefde, respect en identiteit zocht tijdens de helse jaren van de tweede wereldoorlog en lang daarna.

Vijf jaar duurde de oorlog, maar 75 jaar later heeft de collaboratie van destijds nog altijd de kracht om gemeenschappen en politieke partijen te verdelen.  Waarom collaboreerden zo vele, overwegend zeer jonge, Vlamingen destijds met de vijand?  

'Omdat ik Vlaming ben' vertelt ons aan de hand van het leven van Florine De Pauw uit het kleine dorpje Kerksken (Haaltert) hoe het was om in de jaren dertig van de vorige eeuw op te groeien als Vlaming in België.

'Omdat Ik Vlaming Ben' is verkrijgbaar bij meerdere uitgevers

(Prijzen te vermeerderen eventuele verzendingskosten afhankelijk van het verkooppunt)

http://www.lulu.com/shop/eddy-adriaens/omdat-ik-vlaming-ben/paperback/product-22013368.html
(17 € retailprijs; 14.90 € bij aankoop via Lulu Webshop)

http://www.shopmybooks.com/BE/en/book/eddy-adriaens/omdat-ik-vlaming-ben-0 (23,14 €)

http://www.amazon.de/Omdat-Vlaming-Ben-Eddy-Adriaens/dp/132616435X (18,19 €)
Bij Amazon: gratis levering voor bestellingen vanaf 29 €, kleinere bestellingen: 3,25 € + 0,50€ per kg)

VIA DE BOEKHANDEL:  ISBN NR 978 161 627 1305

'Omdat Ik Vlaming Ben' is eveneens beschikbaar als E-pub of PDF eboek via volgende links:

http://www.lulu.com/shop/eddy-adriaens/omdat-ik-vlaming-ben/ebook/product-22013481.html (5 €)

https://www.scribd.com/doc/253955849/Omdat-Ik-Vlaming-Ben  (4,99 €)

amazon kindle:  in processing

 ‘Marleen' - Eddy Adriaens

"Marleen" is het verhaal van de apenjaren van Eddy: drie vreemde jaren die beginnen op die eerste schooldag in 1970, als hij verliefd wordt op een nieuwe klasgenote: Marleen.  Een verhaal vol ups and downs, doodlopende straatjes en onverwachte wendingen. Een verhaal zoals het leven zelf, dat je meeneemt op een tocht door je eigen herinneringen. Een verhaal dat je niet meer wil neerleggen voor het helemaal uitgelezen is en dat je achterlaat met een glimlach en een warm gevoel. Niet omwille van het happy end, maar omdat je onderweg jezelf hebt herkend.

 'Marleen' is uitgegeven bij onder meer Lulu

(Prijzen te vermeerderen eventuele verzendingskosten afhankelijk van het verkooppunt)

http://www.shopmybooks.com/BE/en/book/eddy-adriaens/marleen-0 (338 blz - 22,50 €)

http://www.lulu.com/shop/eddy-adriaens/marleen/paperback/product-13039617.html (248 blz - retailprijs 18,00 € - bij aankoop op de website van Lulu:16,65 €)

http://www.standaardboekhandel.be/seo/nl/boeken/literaire-fictie/9781452886756/eddy-adriaens/marleen (211 blz  17,86 €)

http://www.boek.be/boek/marleen-2 (211 blz  17,86 €)

http://www.feedaread.com/books/Marleen.aspx (338 blz  14,75 €)

'Marleen' is eveneens beschikbaar als E-pub of PDF eboek via volgende links:

http://www.amazon.nl/Marleen-Dagboek-Apenjaren-Handelsschool-Aalst-ebook/dp/B00ND71S9E  (Kindle, 4,38 €)

http://www.lulu.com/shop/eddy-adriaens/marleen/ebook/product-18476101.html (PDF  4,78 €)

https://nl.scribd.com/doc/243323495/Marleen-of-Het-Dagboek-Van-Mijn-Apenjaren (PDF  4,99 €)

‘Sarah En De Liefde’ -  Nele Smit

Sarah beschrijft in deze verhalenbundel haar ervaringen met haar boyfriends. Zij vertelt ons hoe daten niet alleen zorgt voor romantische belevenissen en momenten van intens geluk, maar ook voor de nodige kopzorgen, twijfels, ontgoochelingen, verdriet en zelfs angst.

Sarah is een levenslustig tienermeisje dat geniet van haar jeugd en gebruik maakt van de toenemende vrijheid om op ontdekking te gaan in het leven. Centraal staat haar kennismaking met "de liefde". Al vlug leert zij dat relaties niet alleen goed zijn voor romantische momenten maar ook zorgen voor de nodige kopzorgen, twijfels, ontgoochelingen, verdriet en zelfs angst.

"Sarah en de Liefde" is een aanrader voor alle al wat oudere tieners en nostalgische volwassen zielen. In de verhalen komen onderwerpen aan bod als: jeugdverliefdheid, vakantieliefde, internetrelaties, daten met klasgenoten, tienerzwangerschap, maar ook de risico's van misbruik, ontvoering en verkrachting.

'Sarah En De Liefde' is uitgegeven bij onder meer Lulu

(Prijzen te vermeerderen eventuele verzendingskosten afhankelijk van het verkooppunt)

http://www.lulu.com/shop/nele-smit/sarah-en-de-liefde/paperback/product-21443627.html (9,45 €)

http://www.amazon.com/Sarah-Liefde-Belevenissen-Tienermeisje-Edition/dp/1477619518 (8,21 $)

http://www.amazon.fr/Sarah-Liefde-Belevenissen-van-Tienermeisje/dp/1477619518 (8,33 €)

http://www.shopmybooks.com/BE/en/book/eddy-adriaens/sarah-en-de-liefde (19,26 €)

http://www.feedaread.com/books/Sarah-en-de-Liefde.aspx (8,33 €)

'Sarah En De Liefde' is eveneens beschikbaar als E-pub of PDF eboek via volgende links:

http://www.lulu.com/shop/nele-smit/sarah-en-de-liefde/ebook/product-21443673.html (3,78 €, PDF)

https://www.scribd.com/doc/243323896/Sarah-en-de-Liefde-Belevenissen-Van-Een-Tienermeisje-Nele-Smit (4,99 $, PDF)

http://www.amazon.nl/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=sarah%20en%20de%20liefde  (5,75 €, Kindle)

01-02-2015 om 00:00 geschreven door Adrian

Nieuw boek

20 januari, 2015 door Eddy Adriaens

Met trots presenteer ik mijn nieuw boek "Omdat Ik Vlaming Ben".

Het boek schetst aan de hand van de levensloop van Florine De Pauw geboren in 1921 in het kleine dorpje Kerksken (Haaltert), het gevoel van achterstelling dat in de periode rond het uitbreken van de tweede wereldoorlog leefde bij vele Vlamingen.

Haar generatie had de de verhalen gehoord, en de gevolgen gezien, van de manier waarop Vlaamse soldaten aan het IJzerfront vernederd en zelfs onnodig opgeofferd werden door ééntalig Frans sprekende officieren. De manier waarop het Belgisch Establishment en de Katholieke Kerk met Priester Daens had afgerekend, droegen zij vers in hun geheugen. Bovendien stelden zij vast dat er voor een Vlaming nog altijd geen mogelijkheid bestond om in de eigen taal te studeren en ervoeren zij aan den lijve hoe de Vlamingen in België behandeld werden als tweederangsburgers

Bij het uitbreken van de oorlog, werden deze gevoelens alleen maar versterkt doordat wie actief was in de Vlaamse Beweging automatisch als collaborateur bestempeld werd.  Niet altijd ten onrechte, want velen droomden nog altijd van een hereniging van Vlaanderen met Nederland en zagen België enkel als een onderdrukkende staatsstructuur. Het waren vooral de meest kwetsbaren, de jongeren, bij wie idealen en de drang tot overleven de ogen deed sluiten voor de mogelijke gevolgen, die na de oorlog zouden terechtstaan als collaborateurs.

De levensloop van Florine De Pauw leent er zich bij uitstek toe kennis te nemen met wat het was om destijds als Vlaming geboren te worden, hoe dit gegeven de denkbeelden van de mensen vormde, en wat daar de gevolgen konden van zijn. 

‘Omdat ik Vlaming ben’ is een sociale aanklacht, weliswaar met humor verzacht. Het is een politiek manifest, geschreven met een gevoel van mededogen en in de wetenschap dat de ‘vijand’ in elk van ons loert. Maar het is vooral het ontroerende verhaal van Florine, die liefde, respect en identiteit zocht tijdens de helse jaren van de tweede wereldoorlog en lang daarna.

Op het moment ben ik nog bezig met de laatste puntjes, maar de voorbereidingen schieten goed op. Wil je alvast jouw exemplaar van "Omdat Ik Vlaming Ben" reserveren, of wens je bericht te ontvangen wanneer het boek in de handel verkrijgbaar is, stuur dan een email naar adriaens.eddy@telenet.be en ik verwittig je zodra het boek klaar is.

Over mezelf:

Ik werd geboren op 21.09.1953 in het Oost-Vlaamse Aalst en groeide er samen met mijn zes broers en zussen op in de wijk Terjoden. Na mijn studies aan de Handelsschool te Aalst werkte ik 14 jaar bij lokale KMO's als korrespondent, directie-assistent en hoofd verkoopadministratie. Sinds 1986 werk ik bij Belfius Bank. Ik ben getrouwd met Arlette Scheerlinck, vader van een dochter, Tamara en woon in Nederhasselt - Ninove.

Eerder publiceerde ik "Marleen", het dagboek van mijn apenjaren in de Handelsschool te Aalst, en "Sarah en de Liefde", een verhalenbundel over de ervaringen van een tienermeisje, geschreven samen met mijn zus Marlies Adriaens en gepubliceerd onder het pseudoniem Nele Smit.

Regelmatig stel ik - hoofdzakelijk Engelstalige - themaboeken samen. Deze handelen vooral over aspecten van coaching, counseling en communicatie en worden gepubliceerd op http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie.

20-01-2015 om 12:07 geschreven door Adrian

13-10-2014 om 15:59 geschreven door Adrian

HOW TO PERFORM ON THE JOB TRAINING?

According to The Encyclopedia of Business, ©2000 Gale Cengage, On-the-job training is by far the predominant form of job training, particularly for non-managerial employees.

Numerous studies also indicate that it is the most effective form of job training. Yet, On-the-job training also represents a significant investment considering that roughly 30 percent of a new worker's time is spent in on-the-job training during the first 90 days of employment, that productivity of experienced workers assigned to train new workers may decrease during the training period, and that new workers may make expensive mistakes.

Both companies and workers therefore profit largely from the presence of simple, but complete trainee and trainer guides that allow for executing OJT in a structured way.

“How to perform on-the-job training”, has the information, techniques and tips that will allow you to implement a professional OJT training program.  The book also includes all the tools, documents and checklists necessary for setting up a qualitative and efficient skills training program for OJT coaches. 

http://www.lulu.com/shop/dean-amory/how-to-perform-on-the-job-training/paperback/product-21041139.html

http://www.lulu.com/shop/dean-amory/how-to-perform-on-the-job-training/ebook/product-21041175.html

29-05-2013 om 07:46 geschreven door Adrian

http://www.lulu.com/shop/dean-amory/the-magic-power-of-mental-images/paperback/product-21022668.html

http://www.lulu.com/shop/dean-amory/the-magic-power-of-mental-images-i-am-the-tigress/ebook/product-21022704.html

THE MAGIC POWER OF MENTAL IMAGES

THE VISION OF THE TIGRESS

Compiled by Dean Amory

What Is Mental Imagery And How Does It Work?
Mental imagery, also called visualization or mental rehearsal, is an experience that resembles a perceptual experience, but which occurs in the absence of the appropriate stimuli for the relevant perception.

Mental images have the power to change your life. The mental images that you often visualize affect your life, whether you are aware of this or not.

If you visualize negative situations, difficulties and problem, and continue doing so, your moods will gradually become negative, you will alienate people, you will close your eyes to opportunities, and your self-esteem will go down. How can you achieve success if you are so negative?

On the other hand, successful people attract success, because they constantly imagine and expect success

What Can Mental Imagery Do To Enhance Your Life?
Mental images are like a movie or still pictures that you see in your mind. If you watch them again and again your subconscious mind will ultimately accept them as you reality.

Through Mental Imagery you can affect your thinking, behaviour and world.  If you visualize what you really and truly desire and how you will achieve these goals; if you replace self limiting thoughts by inspiring and motivating thoughts; negative habits by positive habits; prepare yourself mentally for challenging and difficult situations and picture yourself as the happy, healthy and successful person you want to be, you will improve your skills and become more happy and successful in your life!

How To Use Mental Imagery

• Practice Daily. 
• Use short visualizations during your daily activities and longer visualizations while relaxing and prior to meeting specific challenges.
• Use visualization boards as a computer wallpaper, sleeping room decoration or at places where they will regularly remind you of what is important to you.

Use Different Techniques of Mental Imagery for Different Purposes

Mental Imagery is an excellent way to

• Manifest your Dreams and Desires
• Reduce Stress
• Create a Mental Safe Place
• Define Priorities and Strategies
• Get Rid of Stumble Blocks
• Eliminate Negative Behaviour
• Perfectionalize your Skills
• Improve Problem Solving and Decision Making
• Clear your Mind from Emotional Clutter
• Find Balance
• Let Go and Break Free

Some Of The Things You Can Do With Mental Imagery

1. Manifest your Dreams and Desires

• Dreams do come true, but first you have to dream them, Right?
• If you aim at nothing you'll hit it every time.
• Goals are dreams with deadlines: If you don’t set priorities, if your short term goals don’t serve a long term vision, if you don’t select strategies, and don’t take action: how will you reach your goals? 
  

• Confront and eliminate irrational believes, fears and internal conflicts and turn your stumble blocks into stepping stones
• Take responsibility for your own emotions and actions:
  • • Recognize that neither another person, nor an adverse circumstance, can ever disturb you.  Only you can.
    • Replace “must” by “strongly prefer”
      
   
  
  4. Eliminate Negative Behaviour
  
  Use Covert Sensitization:
  Imagine engaging in some behaviour you wish to change, say, an addiction. Have this quickly followed by imagining a highly unpleasant event. Thus, the addictive behaviour becomes paired with a highly aversive event and therefore is less likely to occur in the future.
  Next: imagine how your life will be without the negative behaviour.
  
  5. Perfectionalize your Skills
  Systematically visualize the desired correct coping behaviour and its benefits for you.
  This technique has seen much use in sports.
  Seeing yourself perform skills at a high level, the way you want to: confident, accurate, focused, … is a good way to build confidence and a feeling of readiness prior to a challenging task (public presentation, important meeting, …) or competition.
  
  6. Improve Problem Solving and Decision Making

Choose an image to focus on to help you through a troublesome period.
Visualize yourself as a superwoman who can easily scale the highest skyscrapers or a marathon runner who outruns all of his competitors.
Put your problems inside a carton and imagine it getting smaller and smaller until it can easily fit into your pocket. You'll discover that your problem is easier to carry inside your pocket than the heavy weight of it sitting on your shoulders.
Or, you can visualize your problems magically disappearing before your eyes. There are no limitations in your visualizing. It can be magical.

When you are struggling with making a decision between two different options, try visualizing yourself involved in the two scenarios and imagine the results of your decision. This visualization exercise should help you in making the right decision.

7. Clear your Mind from Emotional Clutter

• Too many thoughts and mental pictures can convolute the mind
• Choose images that erase, filter, or organize your thoughts. Much like de-cluttering a closet, you can use visualization to reduce mental clutter.
• There are three causes of mental clutter: Avoidance, Indecision, and Procrastination. Don’t avoid them. Confront them Now!

8. Find Balance
Use visualizations to help you ground and find balance. Because our energies are always in flux it is important to "check in" with our bodies routinely to adjust and centre ourselves.

• If you find yourself stubbing your toes or bumping into things, you are not in balance.
• If you are experiencing mental confusion or are all over the place emotionally, a centring visualization can help return you to calm and better focus.

9. Let Go and Break Free
Are you having difficulty walking away from a toxic relationship? Or do you tend to dwell on the past instead of moving forward in your life?
Choose images in your visualization sessions which will allow you to break free from problematic people and move past personal regrets.
We cannot change the past, but we can create our futures. Begin a new way of living by visualizing it first!

10. Familiarize
Mental imagery can be used effectively to familiarize yourself with the surroundings before an event, such as an interview, an important meeting, a sales conversation or negotiation, a public presentation, a competition site, a racetrack, a stage or a difficult play or routine prior to a competition ...

11. Do a Run-Through
Mental Imagery can be used as a cognitive technique to plan strategies, rehearse procedures or game plans, affirm what you want to occur, or as a coping skill strategy to stay calm and composed under pressure. 
Athletes and performers often do a complete mental run through of the key elements of their routines. This helps them focus, eliminate some pre-performance jitters and be more comfortable. It also serves as a warm-up or mini rehearsal.

• An important key foundation in Neuro-linguistic Programming is modelling. To model, you emulate those who have already achieved success. You observe, analyze and then replicate the factors that contributed to the outstanding performance.
• While there is no 100% guarantee that you can reap the same results, modelling helps you shorten your learning curve. You learn to avoid common mistakes and apply the essential steps and strategies that have helped your role model succeed. The idea is that it is much easier to follow a previously proven path to success.

• Animal totems contain a natural power that can allow you to see and love and know more of the earth, life and especially yourself.

• Animal spirit guide totems hold power and knowledge that we can use to be one with nature - all that is and will be and use the power of nature to achieve our goals. Many cultures of the past understood and used the power of animal totems.

• Totems can be particularly useful in today's society where it is easy to forget the essence and true spirit of life and love in the midst of high technology.

• Use your personal animal totem to awaken the natural balance with nature that you already possess. You can be healthier and happier physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually in understanding and honouring your animal totems.

16. Borrow The Mind Of A Genius Or The Powers Of Your Hero
The truth is that you can be anything that you want to be—but you do have to work at it.



If you want to find out more about how you can use the magical power of mental imagery to enhance your life, visit my bookshop at :

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17-05-2013 om 11:32 geschreven door Adrian

The cover illustration is from Zirta from Mexico: www.zirta.net

E-mail address: beatriz@zirta.net - betyto@gmail.com

* The electronic edition of this practical family therapy manual is available as a free download file at http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie?searchTerms=family+therapy

* The paperback book can be purchased at the lulu website: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie?searchTerms=family+therapy

· Brief Strategic Family Therapy

· Brief Strategic Family Therapy for Adolescent Drug Abuse

· Solution Focused Brief Therapy

· Brief Psycho Therapy

· Psycho-analytiuc Family Therapy

· Strategic Family Therapy

· Bowen’s Strategic Family Therapy

· Salvador Minuchin’s Structural Family Therapy

· Virginia Satir’s Humanistic Family Therapy

· Behavioural & Conjoint Family Therapy

· Milan Systemic Family Therapy or Long Brief Therapy

· Response Based Family Therapy

· Contextual Family Therapy

· Narrative Family Therapy

· Problem Centered Systems Family Therapy

· Experiential Family Therapy

ACCOMMODATION

AFFECTIVE CONFRONTATION

ASKING PERMISSION

BEGINNER’S MIND

BOUNDARY FORMATION

ADDING COGNITIVE CONSTRUCTIONS

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES

COMMUNICATION SKILL-BUILDING TECHNIQUES

CONCLUSION

CONFIRMATION OF A FAMILY MEMBER:

DEFRAMING

DETRIANGULATION

DIAGNOSING

DIFFERENTIATION OF SELF

DISEQUILIBRIUM TECHNIQUES

LESSONS IN EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

EMOTIONAL CUT-OFF

THE EMPTY CHAIR

ENACTMENT

FAMILY CHOREOGRAPHY

FAMILY CONTRACT

FAMILY COUNCIL MEETINGS

FAMILY FLOOR PLAN

FAMILY LIFE CYCLE

FAMILY PHOTOS

FAMILY SCULPTING

FAMILY SYSTEM STRATEGIES

THE GENOGRAM

GOAL SETTING

ICEBREAKER COMPLIMENT OR POSITIVE STATEMENT

IDENTIFICATION

INFORMATION-GATHERING TECHNIQUES

INTENSITY

INTERVENTION TECHNIQUES

· RELATIONSHIP EXPERIMENTS.

· COACHING.

· I-POSITIONS.

· DISPLACEMENT STORIES.

· TAKING SIDE & MEDIATING.

· THE EMPTY CHAIR

· FAMILY COUNCIL MEETINGS

· STRATEGIC ALLIANCES

· PRESCRIBING INDECISION

· PUTTING THE CLIENT IN CONTROL OF THE SYMPTOM

· SPECIAL DAYS, MINI-VACATIONS, SPECIAL OUTINGS

· PROBLEM SOLVING

· FAMILY CONTRACTS

· REFRAMING

· PUNCTUATION

· UNBALANCING

· RESTRUCTURING

· ENACTMENT

· BOUNDARY FORMATION

· WORKING WITH SPONTANEOUS INTERACTION

· INTENSITY

· SHAPING COMPETENCE

· ADDING COGNITIVE CONSTRUCTIONS

INVOLUNTARY CLIENT SHEMA

JOINING

NORMALIZATION

OBSERVATION

POSITIVE CONNOTATION

PARADOXICAL INJUNCTIONS

PRAGMATIC FICTIONS

PRESCRIBING INDECISION

PROBLEM TRACKING

PROBLEM SOLVING TECHNIQUES

PROBLEM DISSOLUTION

PUNCTUATION

PUTTING CLIENT IN CONTROL OF THE SYMPTOM

QUESTIONS

REFRAMING

REFRAMING PROBLEM DEFINITIONS

RESTRUCTURING

SHAPING COMPETENCE

USE OF SILENCE

SPECIAL DAYS, MINI-VACATIONS, SPECIAL OUTINGS

WORKING WITH SPONTANEOUS INTERACTION

STRATEGIC ALLIANCES

TRACKING

UNBALANCING

INTRODUCING UNCERTAINTY

UTILIZATION STRATEGY

20-04-2013 om 15:30 geschreven door Adrian

Unlike people who are trying to influence, persuade or convince others, manipulators work with unfair means to get what they want.  They do not respect the personal rights of their victims. They violate the victim's integrity, work with hidden agendas and deliberately use dishonest tricks like faulty reasoning, coercion, blackmail and lying in an attempt to control the victim's actions. Manipulation is about suiting the manipulator's advantage or purpose only, often at the expense of the victim.

Yet, it is often difficult to know when you are being manipulated: manipulators do all they can to convince you that you are the one who is to benefit most from their actions and that they are acting in good faith.

It's often really difficult to recognize manipulation when it happens.  After all, if we are aware that it is happening, would we allow ourselves to be manipulated?

That is where this book comes in handy: it explains the tricks manipulators use and teaches you how to best defend and protect yourself.
 

02-04-2013 om 15:38 geschreven door Adrian

Influence includes being able to persuade, motivate and negotiate in order to get what you want.

Imagine just for a moment how important it is to each of us to improve our ability to influence others: to make friends and inspire them,  to win other people for our standpoint or to make business contacts and reach positive agreements with them.

What if you were even only slightly more successful in this art?  Just imagine the possible benefits for your personal life, your love life, your career, your social life, your personal happiness, your financial position!

You know how important it is to educate yourself, to develop a vision, to plan, and to work towards your goals with flexibility and perseverance.  Yet you also know that the race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, nor does food always come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned. 

One of the main reasons why excellent people do not advance in their careers or fail in life, is because they don't realize the enormous importance of networking and communication.

Knowledge and personal capacities are not enough to be successful.  You need influencing skills to make it in this life!

Since this great book about the art of influencing and persuading others, is composed of articles found in the public domain, which are freely accessible for anybody on the internet, it's only fair that you should also be able to download this book totally free of costs.

So, why not download the book and start today to take your influencing and persuading skills to the next level?

The knowledge contained in this book will allow you to be happier in your life and more successfully

* make friends and inspire them

* win other people for your standpoint

* make business contacts

* negotiate positive agreements

* advance in your career

* enhance your personal life, your love life, your social life

* enhance your personal happiness

* enhance your financial position

By getting better at influencing and persuading people, you will in short, be able to create for yourself and your loved ones the kind of life you have been dreaming of

It's free, so just get started now!

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Dean Amory

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DE WETTEN VAN GOEDE COMMUNICATIE
Door Eddy Adriaens

17-10-2012 om 14:31 geschreven door Adrian

BOEKEN VERKRIJGBAAR OP  http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie

Leven is Communiceren Door Eddy Adriaens

e-boek (Pdf): € 2,99

Communiceren is hoe je in contact komt met anderen. De manier waarop je dat doet is meteen van enorm belang voor het ontwikkelen van bevredigende en succesvolle relaties. In dit werk focust Eddy Adriaens op een aantal zeer belangrijke communicatietechnieken: contacten leggen en onderhouden, vrienden maken en houden, een gesprek starten en in gang houden, jezelf en anderen motiveren, spreken in het openbaar ... het draait allemaal rond communicatie. Goede communicatie op haar beurt vereist sterke interpersoonlijke vaardigheden. Hoe word je meer assertief? Hoe geef en ontvang je feedback? Hoe vraag je iets en hoe reageer je op een verzoek? Hoe breng je slecht nieuws? Hoe ga je om met verandering? In "Leven is communiceren" vind je gedetailleerde informatie en nuttige tips om je communicatie met anderen te verbeteren en zowel privé als beroepsmatig beter te scoren. "Leven is communiceren" is zowel als downloadfile als in boekvorm verkrijgbaar bij http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie

Meer informatie

Meer informatie

CURSUS GEHEUGENTRAINING Door Eddy Adriaens

Paperback: € 5,61

Wordt binnen 3 tot 5 werkdagen verzonden

Deze praktische cursus geheugentraining wil vooral een praktische hulp zijn in het dagelijkse leven. Zij richt zich dan ook vooral op het onthouden van: 1. Leerstof 2. nieuwe dingen opslaan om te onthouden voor later 3. taken 4. voorvallen uit het verleden 5. namen

  Meer informatie

CURSUS PRAKTISCHE GEHEUGENTRAINING

e-boek (Pdf): € 1,90

*********************************************

Meer informatie

Praktisch Creatief Denken Door Eddy Adriaens

e-boek (Pdf): € 2,19

Praktisch Creatief Denken is een werkboek voor creatief denken gebaseerd op de technieken gesystematiseerd door Edward de Bono.

Meer informatie

Praktisch Creatief Denken Door Eddy Adriaens

Paperback: € 5,77

Wordt binnen 3 tot 5 werkdagen verzonden

*********************************************

  Meer informatie

Meer informatie

PRAKTISCHE MARKETING EN PUBLICITAIRE COPYWRITING Door Eddy Adriaens

Paperback: € 5,75

Wordt binnen 3 tot 5 werkdagen verzonden

********************************************* 

Meer informatie

Essential Knowledge for Personal Coaches Door Dean Amory

Paperback: € 24,68

Wordt binnen 3 tot 5 werkdagen verzonden

(1 beoordelingen)

Whether you are considering life coaching as a career or for self coaching, Dean Amory's Complete Life Coaching and Personal Coaching Course is your best guide for coaching your coachees and yourself towards maximizing your life potential and achieving a happier and more fulfilled life. This is the last in a series of three books. Part 1, “Personal Coaching” is about what Personal Coaching is and offers a survey of the most popular models for Coaching. Part 2, “Techniques for Personal Coaching and Self Coaching” introduces you to the most powerful coaching techniques in use. Part 3, “Essential Knowledge for Personal Coaches”, is a practical standard reference work highlighting the indispensable knowledge and skills anybody who is considering life coaching as a career or as a serious self coaching process

BOEKEN VERKRIJGBAAR OP  http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Jaimelavie

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THE COMPLETE GUIDE FOR PERSONAL COACHING AND SELF COACHING Compiled by Dean Amory

Welcome to this introductory page about personal coaching or life coaching which will give you access to a practical training program that will allow you to enhance your own life and the life of others.  Totally free and without any other commitment on your part than your desire to advance in life, to become more happy and successful and to share the benefits of this self development with others.

When searching for information about coaching using Google, you are presented with about 275.000.000 leads.  The fact that you selected this page therefore means that you are committed to learning about the best ways to improve the level of wellness of yourself and of other people.

All coaching is always also self coaching. Because, let’s face it: by starting to create and live the life you want for yourself, already you will greatly influence the quality of the lives of your relationships.  On the other hand, if your goal is to inspire and empower others, you will have to balance, organize and advance your own life in the first place.  People do not take swimming lessons from a coach who cannot swim!

Your motivation to boost your own life, to gain insight and find solutions for yourself and overcome the problems you face in life is your best guarantee for success and will allow you to learn, develop and practice amazing new abilities and skills easily and at a pace that will surprise you.

THE COMPLETE GUIDE FOR PERSONAL COACHING AND SELF COACHING Compiled by Dean Amory

The ultimate guide to the models, strategies, techniques and skills of personal coaching and self coaching, covering all the essentials to coaching.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dean Amory's Coaching Guide  is an  invaluable and practical standard reference work and training manual for anybody who takes life coaching

seriously, be it as a means to enhance their own life through self-coaching, or as a professional life coach.

The three books - “Definitions and Models of Coaching”, “Coaching Techniques” and “Essential Knowledge for Coaches” -  together form a comprehensive, highly accessible and easily navigable training program and workbook that is very transferable to the every day practice and by far the most practical coaching source available at this moment for free download on the internet.

Both for professional Life Coaches and as a means of self help for any individual who has taken the decision to enhance his life, Dean Amory's Coaching Guide will soon become a trusted  friend and wise guide that you can always rely on.

The Complete Life Coaching and Personal Coaching Course consists of three books in which you will find all the information, tools and techniques that will allow you to immediately start coaching your coachees and yourself towards maximizing your life potential and achieving a happier and more fulfilled life without any cost for you immediately:

Part 1, “Personal Coaching” is about what Personal Coaching is and offers a survey of the most popular models for Personal Coaching (or “Life Coaching”) and Self Coaching.

Part 2, “Techniques for Personal Coaching and Self Coaching”  introduces you to the most powerful coaching techniques in use and describes the most successful questions and strategies for coaching.

Part 3,  “Essential Knowledge for Personal Coaches”,  is a practical standard reference work highlighting the knowledge and skills that are indispensable for anybody who is considering life coaching as a career or as a serious self coaching process.

Who should read this book?

You should! If you have an interest in helping yourself and others
- assess their current situation
- choose the best path for them and bring about positive change
- discover and follow their talents, values, aspirations and ambitions
- set and achieve the goals necessary to succeed in life
- boost their self esteem and confidence
- inspire them and unwrap their motivation
- enhance their wellbeing, happiness and success in life
- improve their relationships
- improve their personal and communication skills
- deliver the benefits of increased income, pleasure, success and respect
- plan and achieve career progress

Here is why you should read this book:

THE COMPLETE GUIDE FOR PERSONAL COACHING AND SELF COACHING is an outstanding, tailored approach to coaching.  It explains in a comprehensive and detailed way how coaching works. It introduces you to the most important models for life coaching and describes the most successful questions, techniques and skills for coaching in detail.  The book illustrates the coaching strategies with numerous examples of powerful questions and conversations and also contains samples of the most important coaching documents.

THE COMPLETE GUIDE FOR PERSONAL COACHING AND SELF COACHING is the only training manual and workbook of this quality that is freely downloadable, allowing you to start using and evaluating this great toolbox of ideas, scripts and techniques immediately and without any cost for you.

THE COMPLETE GUIDE FOR PERSONAL COACHING AND SELF COACHING is an invaluable and practical roadmap, well written, in a language anybody can understand.  Many practical examples bring the theory to life and allow you to start practicing immediately.

If you cannot afford to pay for a personal coach, or if  you are looking for a qualitative DIY approach to learn the skills you need to satisfy your wants and needs in life and achieve your goals, you should try it yourself right now. It is available totally free at

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Imagine yourself five years from now, then ask yourself honestly: “What is the benefit of not knowing how to best achieve my personal and professional goals in life?”
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17-04-2012 om 11:06 geschreven door Adrian

MARLENE

Diary of my Wonder Years

Translation : Bart Andriessen

About the author:

I am Edgard (Eddy) Adriaens, born 21.09.1953 in the Flemish city of Aalst.   I grew up with my parents and six brothers and sisters in the suburb of Terjoden.   After my high school studies I worked for 14 years in a few SMEs in Aalst as correspondent and assistant (sales) executive. After that I worked for 18 years as a relation manager with the bank Bacob and, finally, after the bank’s merger with the Dexia Bank, as a helpdesk operator with Dexia. 

(Mary Hopkins)

PROLOGUE

“If you are going to San Francisco
Be sure to wear some flowers in your hair.”

(Scott McKenzie)

I come from a world where the long haired youngsters – what was called “long haired” back then – were called Beatles, beatniks or hippies and were looked at in the street.  In this world “Hair” filled the parents with disgust.  “Hair” of course being the distinctive feature of our resistance against a generation and a system that offered the young nothing but hypocrisy and in which the weird dreams of George Orwell seemed to be taking a vast shape.  We were progressive and leftist because imperialism and nationalism, the law of Peace and Order, reached such an extent that it forced us to react, and in between it all we were summoned by the school principal because our hair was too long. 

I come from a world in which the Kennedys were assassinated, just like Camilo Torres, Che Guevara and Martin Luther King.   A world in which the “First Nation” sacrificed a whole generation in Vietnam for the unbridled ambition of its leaders; in which Israel and the Arab countries fought yet another war; in which Bernadette Devlin begged for equal rights on the Irish barricades; in which Nyerere was worshipped and in which young folk in the cafés talked more about politics than about cars, TV or sport.  At least that is, in “our” cafés. 

I come from a world in which a part of that youth was dressed in flared trousers and Indian cotton shirts, preferably canary yellow, red, orange and lilac and if possible all those colours mixed up.  For a long time however, the majority swore to the classic Sunday costume, the kind of which even The Beatles wore during their earliest TV performances. 

In due time, the possibilities of Texas jeans as everyday wear were discovered and as schools started to give up their resistance against this kind of dressing, the streets were coloured in blue.  Meanwhile, for the girls – and actually no less for the boys – Twiggy showed the mini fashion in the unsightly Carnaby Street.  And whilst more and more girls experimented with thread and needle, the female teachers surveyed in certain schools with a rule on the playgrounds: skirts maximum 15 cm above the knee, you know.

In this world smoking was still a “must do”, since the relation with cancer was still only a vague hypothesis.  The only argument against smoking was better than all publicity together: “it looked sloppy!” James Dean showed us just how sloppy one could look and we properly copied that.

In my world the cultural gap between youngsters and adults was absolute.  Our music was totally different, we thought, from everything our parents knew.  Everybody was occupied one way or another with music, and we were all convinced - with justice – that exceptionally original and beautiful music was being produced.    There was Pete Seeger and Joan Baez, Nina Simone was young, gifted and black and Bob Dylan was alongside Mahalia Jackson, obligated church music. Whether you preferred The Rolling Stones, Deep Purple, Pink Floyd, Chicago or rather The Beatles or The Bee Gees, it all determined which pub you frequented and who you bumped into.

During the immediate years after 68, schools were being plagued by endless waves of strikes.  Then, it was the teachers, if not the pupils who were on strike.  We sang “We shall overcome” till long after, and the critical spirit, the urge to have a say in anything we participated in, became stronger by the minute. 

Never before had the older generation experienced this: a crusade of children, their children who openly discussed all the holy commandments and taboos of the world and who considered it a task, tearing down the old values and no expense was spared.

The newspapers wrote about the crisis the authorities faced, but we were young and we thrived on the confusion of the elderly.   Those days the established authority often was but a joke: kids were better educated, better read and better informed.   Parents, city clerks, police officers and teachers didn’t know how to react: they had no experience with our kind of attitude.  Nor did they have an answer to our questions, since our questions often enough were what they were asking themselves.  They doubted the system and its streamlined theories and techniques just as much as we did! It was merely the way in which we expressed our discontent and how we overreacted, because us being young, that filled them with fear: this could not end right!

Meanwhile we skimmed through “The little red books”.  Those basically all said the same thing: “If you don’t want imperialistic Neo-Nazis to stay in control, then NOW was the time for a change and ignore their stupid signs.   You can walk on the grass.   You just have to figure out yourself what kind of world you want, then organise yourself and make your dreams become realities.” Did not Ghandi show a quarter of a century before how to do it?

During my youth, the impact of the Second Vatican Council still had to be digested.  For a brief moment there had been great hopes that we would finally get a Church with a human face.  But when Pope John XXVIII died, most of our illusions died with him: the religious fairytales were put back in place one by one.   The church simply asked us to forget about our hopes and dreams and to turn the clock back to the fifties.

Instead, we became the first generation for centuries that dropped out massively.  All of a sudden you had practising and non-practising Catholics, while the interest for other religions and convictions reached its peak.  From Hare Krishna – which was very popular in my world - to the Scientology Church, from pantheism to public atheism ...   All of a sudden, religion was a topic amongst the young.   Only, it was not the kind of religion, or the kind of debate the church and its catholic schoolteachers wanted us to reflect on.   So what?  God is Great, Hallelujah!

“Mortal sin!” the indoctrinated yelled, out of love and care for us.  They felt a strong urge to try and save us, because they really saw us going to hell, which, to us, made their efforts all the more ridiculous.  So the cracks in the Church walls grew bigger and bigger.  Churches went empty and there were less and less priests.  Those who did try to improve the church from within had to accept its dogmas and taboos and lived and preached according to its rules.  Thus they remained part of the lie they were battling.   More and more they got tired of being used and abused and a growing number of priests resigned from office.

In our world the conviction grew that “Love” was the only constructive element in the world and “Sin” was everything that was detrimental to it.  “Beautiful People” Melanie sang in her early youth and John Lennon, a working class hero, discovered the woman, the “nigger of the world”, and ruminated and repeated the dream of millions into the simplified one-liner success of “Imagine”.    Meanwhile, Woodstock and Wight amazed the world.   But in reality these were no more than commercial lies based on the quality of its performers and on the bubble of the massive free love parties. 

When “Love Story” was declared the most successful movie of a generation, we felt the wave of revolt and renewal was running out of steam. The movie did not give us anything: maybe it was nice, but it was also corny, deliberately dramatic, two-dimensional and over simplified, making it typical for the mass production ideas of the consumption society in which we risked to be drowned.  The fact that the book, the movie and the music all became such massive hits was no doubt indicative: the ultimate proof of the pointlessness of our ideals.  The “Mourir d’aimer” of this movie and others like it, endeared my generation because it had nothing to do with napalm over Vietnam or helping Somoza in Nicaragua and because escaping reality has always been the easiest option for the masses, but also because we were young after all and hopelessly searching for “LOVE, NOT WAR”. 

“Mit Siebzehn hat man noch Träume”.  In 1970 I turned 17.  I had never heard a bad song from Creedence Clearwater Revival, I considered myself a melancholic romantic and a non-conformist. I was light-hearted and lived rather chaotically.

Thanks to an occasional side income and some black magic, I was able to spent tons every week on cigarettes and booze from whatever little I received as a weekly allowance.  Still I had to scratch to get around. I didn’t practise any sport, didn’t have any hobbies, and had no idea what to do after school.  Perhaps I rode home after school, perhaps I didn’t.  Perhaps I went out during the weekend, perhaps I didn’t.  Perhaps I did my homework, perhaps I didn’t.  Perhaps I studied but until I actually started; I was the last one to know.  I didn’t plan anything, had no ambitions, no goals.  I just lived.

Part of my life occurred in Terjoden, a working class community bordering Aalst where I was born in 1953.  A gloomy suburb without any history, quickly constructed when a railway station had been built in neighbouring Haaltert, alongside the provincial road from Aalst to Geraardsbergen,.   

The rest of my life I spent in Aalst, a medium sized city in the heart of Flanders, where I went to school – or rather was wagging school – and where I hung out in the weekends in a discotheque called “The Caspuciero”.  Or with soccer player Vander Elst, where I was made a member of the “James Dean Friends Club”, without ever having any knowledge what this Club did, except distributing access cards and stamps for the dance hall situated behind the pub.

During the weekdays the bars in the Korte Nieuwstraat and those around the Station square brought me comfort when the theory courses in school were on.

Aalst, is of course Carnival.  There are those who think that Carnival is a public feast taking place the days before Ash Wednesday.  In reality, every day is a bit Carnival in Aalst, because every Carnival guild is always in need of money and every ball they organised to collect funds was just as well Carnival.

Aalst was also the Belfry, where the artists from the local academy – and the occasional other – exhibited their works.  Although the supplied exhibitions disappointed me time and time again, I could never resist the sign saying “exhibition”: the chance to see one beautiful sculpture, one beautiful painting, was an irresistible attraction and drew me inside, into the Knights Hall, or downstairs in the mediaeval crypt, where I usually ended up in utter disappointment staring at - and not grasping the meaning of - three sawed broom sticks wrapped in chicken wire with a sign in front saying “Andromeda”. 

Aalst, finally, was also the “Bon Marché”, a major department store where I wandered when all my money was gone, going endlessly through books and listening to records in the music department.

In this life, without wanting to, as it always goes, I met Marlene.  The impact Marlene had on my emotional life was total.  My life became Marlene: two pair of eyes, two mouths, four hands, one belly. Everything else became extremely vague for me.  Marlene was my love, my obsession, the mirror of my dreams.  But just as well my oracle and the mirror of my helplessness.  The next pages are all about this strange and astonishing experience.

Chapter 1

“Get Ready”

(Rare Earth)

Can you imagine anything more wretched than having to go back to school after working a holiday job for two months? Isn’t it somewhat degrading to turn in your paycheck for a new set of schoolbooks after feeling responsible for your job for two months? Economically you’re thrown back to being totally worthless from one day to the next, feeling  like a fish caught in a net, waiting to get stuffed and contribute to the modern consumption society.  On top of that my moped was parked in the garage with a broken gas cable and of course I got out of bed too late to catch the bus.  No wonder I was already in a shitty mood that Monday morning, the fourth of September, when I found myself hitchhiking to the local trade school.  Officially: “The National Institute for Higher Education in Trade and Administration”. The school’s name was amply sufficient to scare the living daylights out of any self-respecting human being.   Probably based on a Russian conference about the success of the last Five-Year Plan.  Not to mention the fact we would have to write down that school litany in our notebooks these first few days.                

But as soon as I found myself within the ‘safe’ walls of the school, I started feeling a whole lot better: that traditional first day of school atmosphere with its unbelievable bickering and fussing suited me just fine.  People offer you cigarettes that often, one begins to wonder if they’re earning commission from the tobacco companies.    

Some pupils were chomping their fingernails, in suspense of their re-examinations results.  The girls commented on your clothes, the length of your hair or your tan, or told you who’s new, who isn’t coming back and why. 

Some women really have a nose for those kinds of novelties and they usually get most stuff right.  They smell their sources and know their clients.  Only the sieving of the less interesting details regularly went wrong.  How could it be any different with our – the blokes - small talk, being an impossible task, when it’s their biggest specialty? Part of the blokes were trying one-upmanship, and when you fell in their trap, you were in for a treat with the craziest Wild West stories about ‘mighty’ holidays and countless love adventures with girls coming straight out of  Playboy Magazine.

I avoided the monkey troop cliques with a cheerful but distant “hello” and continued in my search for someone more “human”.

The bright green eyes of my friend Udo received a lot of attention from a few giggling girls, but as soon as he noticed my body odor, he headed towards me.   

‘Well, Pithecanthropus erectus how are you?’

Apparently, his urge for knowledge had incited him into a hunt for the history of our origin.  Sometimes, when we were both in the mood, we amused ourselves by using as many polished words as possible.  “Boasting” we called it and quite funny! I thought I could get away by answering, “underdeveloped Mylodon”, but decided to show off a bit myself.

‘You can address me as Sir Australopithecus and forget about the erectus. Some of us do evolve.’

‘Hmm, you do know that you’re evolving backwards, don’t you? Your Australopithecus lived a long time before my Pithecanthropus!’

Obviously, I had underestimated the competence of his reading matter.

‘But let’s not drivel on that.  Have you seen Rudy yet? The chap grew a beard.  And did you know Willy’s sister is joining this school now?’

Beards were lost on me: mine flatly refused to emerge.  Willy’s sister didn’t really interest me either. In fact, Willy wasn’t my cup of tea at all so I didn’t expect any fireworks from a sister of his.  Willy was a big, somewhat silent boy, who kept himself aloof in class and who was capable of incredible feats like digging the garden of a teacher.  But then, who cares about the shrubbery on the face of an old acquaintance or the sister of an insignificant classmate, when all that mattered was who’s new in class.           

If I didn’t want to lose my gratuity completely, I had to attend Religion classes and ran the risk of being saddled with a couple of despicable elements in the class.  While those kids hailing from the more dynamic and progressive families tended to opt for Ethics, the well-behaved ones, whose parents saw the Light From Above, preferred Religion.  Since I fell in that category, I was dying to know who ended up where.

‘No, you’re not the first one I’m talking to.  Any ideas about the changes in our class?’ I asked.

‘Don’t even mention it mate’, Udo said. ‘I’ve been trying for a week now not to think about our fantastic class, then you turn up and rub my nose in it.  One good advice: don’t put your hopes up, and things will probably not turn out all that badly.’

‘Thanks for bucking me up. ‘

Meanwhile, Danny and George had noticed us and were walking cheerfully towards us to mingle in, and then the bell rang before they even got to us. 

A few minutes later, it turned out Udo didn`t get things that wrong. On the first row I noticed some bloke who looked like a living fossil with a nose like a beak and ears like an elephant’s, frantically writing down the tutor’s welcome speech.   Udo had noticed him as well.

‘Say, is that your twin brother there?’

‘Get some glasses for those mole eyes of yours,’ I replied.   

‘Sorry, but didn’t you say I could call you Australopithecus?’

I burst out laughing.  1-0 for the bastard and the kickoff wasn’t even given!

But more new pupils drew my attention: on my opposite I saw a well built female painting her name with big, angular characters on the cover of a brand new and nicely covered notebook, using red and green, creating a colorful artwork. And in a lost corner on the other end of the classroom, a new guy the size of a telephone post, was chattering away with two veterans in front of him.  The more I stared, the more I started liking him.  Not bad! But about three tables in front of me, I discovered what appeared to be the most intriguing new comer; obviously female.  Definitely not easily classifiable, because all I saw was a piece of her dustcoat and the back of her head with brown hair, tied up in a little bun. 

Two exceptionally long hours separated us from break.  Two hours, during which she didn’t even glance one single time.   Not even when the teacher warned me and Udo not interrupt his lessons again or “we could forget about picking our seats in class”.   Nonsense with his again: this was the first time he met us.  So either he was brainwashed, or thought that barking at us would suffice to escape the inevitable ordeal that he had coming. Anyhow, not a living soul was thinking of making a racket during those first delicate hours, so needless to say I was bored to death.  The bell didn’t even start ringing when I bashed the door open and stormed out to the playground with the umpteenth cigarette in my mouth. 

Marlene (Diary of my Wonder Years)

by Eddy Adriaens

Synopsis

 On the first day of the new school year, Eddy meets Marlene, a new class mate, and instantly falls in love with her.  In no time, the two become inseparable.  Eddy is euphoric about the relationship, but feels somewhat troubled by the intensity of his own feelings.  Things are no different for Marlene: she’s walking on clouds, but at the same time cautious and even suspicious because of Eddy’s reputation, which her brother does not cease to remind her of. 

 Actually, Marlene’s suspicions are not completely without reason:.  Already on his first evening out without her, Eddy dates another girl.  Shocked by his own behaviour, Eddy flees away.  Fortunately, Marlene never finds out about the incident.  Other aspects of Eddy’s behaviour however do bother her: when she complains about his rude and antisocial attitude, he realises that he is putting their relationship at risk, and tries to fit in.  Soon however, he finds himself in yet another showdown of forces with one of the teachers.  Marlene becomes afraid that she will eventually become a victim of Eddy’s behaviour and asks him to keep more distance at school.  She even considers breaking up, but cannot imagine life without him and affirms quite emotionally her choice for him. 

 Eddy is taken back by the level of her doubts.  More so still when he accepts Marlene’s invitation to visit her at home, only to discover that she does not even dare to talk about their relationship with her parents and that she is still doubting the sincerity of his feelings.  This lasting uncertainty and lack of trust, combined with the fear of losing each other, generates a continual tension between the two youngsters, which clouds the beautiful moments they share and sporadically erupts in real “doubt-attacks”. 

 Meanwhile, they increasingly isolate themselves: in school they have eyes for each other only and also outside the school they invariably spend their time alone and always at the same place.  Hence, the relationship soon assumes a weighty character, and they enjoy themselves less and less.  At the start of the new year, Marlene decides to put an end to the relationship. 

 Initially this does not seem to form a major problem to either one of them.  But when Marlene observes how well Eddy enjoys himself without her  - and he soon finds out that the fun which Marlene envies him for leaves him unsatisfied and lacking for content, the two grow towards each other again.  At one moment, they make up again, but Marlene reconsiders her decision immediately.  Feeling turned down, confused and disappointed, Eddy asks Marlene to avoid all contact between each other.   

 When Marlene refuses to avoid each other completely, they make an attempt to interact as usual class pals.  This attempt quickly dissolves when Marlene gradually increases the intimacy of their contacts at school.   After some time, they almost behave as if they are going together.  However, when Eddy invites Marlene to be his girlfriend again and date also outside school, she refuses

 Again Eddy withdraws feeling refused and depressed.   He tries to desperately find relief in flirting with other girls, but in fact remembers all too well how little satisfaction he got out of this on the previous attempt.  When Marlene watches him kissing another girl, she reacts with disbelief and horror to his behaviour, but after a couple of days tells him that she’s still in love with him.  One week later however, he finds her in close embrace with a boy and decides that this time everything between them is effectively and definitively over.   

 Now, they finally succeed to keep distance of each other.  In the class, ties grow between Eddy, Rudy and Marc.  Every now and then, by chance he and Marlene still have an occasional private conversation.  At each such occasion, the air fills with tension.  At one time it even looks like the two are going to pick up their relationship, but they are interrupted at the crucial point, and later don’t resume their conversation. 

 At the end of the school year, Eddy leaves again for Oostende.  He loves his vacation job at hotel Brabant, especially because, in the evenings, he is responsible for the bar.  Although he is free each afternoon, two weeks go by before he makes it to the beach for the first time.  Initially he is just boring himself there.  After a couple of days, he gets to know a girl at the beach.  Two days later already, she does not show up for their rendezvous.  Next, he has something with a guest at the hotel, but the girl is returning home already only a few days later.  Finally, his luck turns when he meets Maryssa during an evening walk on the dyke.  Maryssa is the kind of girl he could fall in love with.  But soon he learns that she is always surrounded by friends and that it is almost impossible to spend a few moments with her alone.  After a discussion about this, he tells Maryssa that this is not the kind of relationship he is looking for, and walks away.

 Just then Stephanie arrives at the hotel, “the prettiest and most friendly girl he’s ever seen”.  Against his own expectations, the girl falls in love with him and they have a wonderful time together. When Stephanie returns to England, the two continue to write each other on a daily basis.  The last days of the vacation, he spends his afternoon on the beach with Maryssa and her friends.   Meanwhile, the Hall family and their daughter, Deborah, arrive at the hotel. But by then the holidays are finally over and he returns home.
 
At the start of yet another school year, Eddy is still under the spell of Stephanie, with whom he is maintaining a daily correspondence. Stephanie invites him to visit her as soon as possible and late September he leaves for England. The visit is a total failure.  When he returns home one week later, the relationship is definitely over. This unexpected turn of events hurts him deeply. The only place where he feels ok is at school, where he joins a couple of friends, amongst whom Marlene, who study a little dance for the prom.   

Unexpectedly Marlene asks him to go with her again ... until the end of the school. The proposition deeply shocks Eddy.  Actually he would like very much to get back with Marlene, but does not want to enter into a pseudo-relationship with a predetermined end date. He refuses. But the refusal hurts.

Fortunately, a few days after the incident, he learns to know Rolf, the son of a German man, an aunt of his is about to marry. The two amuse themselves very much during the Christmas holidays and from that moment onwards, Rolf will come regularly to Belgium.

By the end of January, at the prom, Eddy meets Arlette and starts dating her. Because she is not going to school in Aalst and rarely goes out in town, his weekend-activities too shift away from Aalst. The relationship also has its consequences in Eddy's class: Elly, a class mate, is a neighbour and friend of Arlette’s.  Moreover, Elly is going with Marc, with whom Eddy already has a pretty good contact.   So, he increasingly spends his time at school with them. He also maintains the contact with Rudy, whom he regularly visits.  On such occasions, he often sleeps over at Rudy’s.  To his astonishment, Marlene now also asks Rudy to go with her until the end of the school. Rudy accepts.  Fortunately, the relationship between Rudy and Marlene remains very limited and does not affect the bond between Rudy and Eddy. When a group of American students come to visit the school and one of them is staying with Rudy, the two even pull together with increasing frequency.

Eddy, Arlette, Marc and Elly also enlist with the new volleyball club in Arlette's village. As Arlette is not allowed to go out every weekend, this looks like a good way to see each other regularly on Sunday mornings. The school year goes by quickly. When Eddy is asked for a vacation job in Spain, he hesitates. Arlette regrets that he will be gone during the holidays, just when she will be more free to go out, but still supports him in his decision to accept the job.

The summer job is a total disaster. Eddy feels exploited and returns back home early in August, partly also because he is worried since Arlette stopped writing after only a couple of letters. Initially it looks as if he has no reason to worry, but when he can only see Arlette at local dances, where their relationship must be kept secret, he insists that she stops hiding their relationship. Arlette refuses: she enjoys the attention of the other boys,  wants to amuse herself as much as possible and certainly does not want to do anything that could lead to a fight with her parents, and hence to being grounded. They therefore decide to stop seeing each other.

The rest of the vacation, he bores himself to death. He feels depressed and even considers emigrating. In order to save some money, he accepts the first job offered to him. By now, Rudy is the only class pall with whom he is still keeping contact.  During the Christmas holidays, the two hitchhike to Germany, visit Rolf and then return with Rolf to Belgium by car.   On their return in Belgium, he takes Rolf along to the Christmas party of the volleyball club, where he begins a relationship with the young Brenda.  Bored of depending on others for his transport, Eddy buys a second hand car.  The relationship with Brenda does not last long, however.  After a couple of months, he has to put an end to it after being informed that she is having a second boyfriend at school.

Rudy now tries to mobilize them for a trip to Nepal. But then he gets a call from Arlette, who has abandoned her studies. He takes her home and keeps visiting her regularly ever since.  After Arlette breaks up with her boyfriend, the two even start going out together.  But Arlette is not ready yet to commit herself seriously.  Eddy remains hopeful, but in the meantime accepts an invitation from Deborah and leaves for two weeks to England. He spends a fantastic time at Deborah’s, but sees no future in England for him and returns to Belgium at the end of his vacation.

Stimulated by Rudy, he then decides to return to school if Arlette does not change her mind at short notice. Arlette hesitates, but when she realizes that he is determined not to visit her again unless she commits herself to him, she chooses to go with him.

The book

Eddy’s wonder years are a time where high peaks alternate with deep abysses. Some experiences inspire him and give him wings, but there are also periods of deep self-doubt and discouragement. At the beginning of the book Eddy is 17 years. Almost all the people he meets are working on their fu

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25-07-2008 om 00:00 geschreven door Adrian

Beste boekenliefhebber,

Graag kondig ik je de publicatie van mijn laatste nieuwe boek aan:
"Het Adriaens-boek".

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MARLEEN 
Dagboek Van Mijn Apenjaren In De Handelsschool In Aalst

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