It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long
Composer(s): Rodney Crowell; Vince Gill
Performer(s): The Notorious Cherry Bombs



She used to call me baby
I thought she was such a lady
But my, how things have changed
Since times moved on

I gave her my last dollar
And now all she'll do is holler
Oh, my life has become
A country song

I've learned she can resist me
By the way she always disses me
And comes to bed at night
With that cold cream on

Sometimes I might feel frisky
But these days it's just too risky

It's hard to kiss the lips at night
That chew your ass out all day long
All day long
It goes on and on

If a tree fell in the forest, she didn't hear it
Would I still be wrong?
I guess I should admit it
She ain't never gonna quit it

It's hard to kiss the lips at night
That chew your ass out all day long

Man I remember when her eyes
Used to be so blue and shiny
God you oughta see
What's happened to her hiney
(Her what?) her hiney

Man that thing is big enough
To land a small plane on
(Small plane?) I'm tellin' ya
I used to roll her in the clover (Mmm, hmm)
But thank God those days are over (Halleluiah!)

It's hard to kiss the lips at night
That chew your ass out all day long
All day long
She goes all day long

If some day they drop the big one
I'd say sweet Jesus
She's gonna finally leave me alone

It's alright if we say it
'Cause the radio won't play it

It's hard to kiss the lips at night
That chew your ass out all day long
It's hard to kiss the lips at night
That chew your ass out all day long...

Christmas Night In Harlem
Composer(s): Mitchell Parish - Raymond Scott
Performer(s): Jack Teagarden & Johnny Mercer
and multiple other artists



(Jack) Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Glory Halle...
(Johnny) What's all that noise?
(Jack) Hallelujah!
(Johnny) Don't give up with that now
(Jack) Glory Halle...
(Johnny) Who's that over in the corner?
(Jack) Hallelujah!
(Johnny) I believe that's Mr. Teagarden
Hey what you doin' up there, Man?
Last time I saw you you were sayin' fare thee well to Harlem
(Jack) I done bin wise g'wine an' I ain't g'wine there n'more
(Johnny) You sho' come back the right time it's Christmas up here
(Jack) What d'ya mean up here, it's Christmas ev'rywhere
(Johnny) Yeah, but it ain't all Christmas like it's Christmas in Harlem
(Jack) No?
(Johnny) Ev'ry gal struttin' with her beau
Through the streets covered white with snow
Happy smiles er'ywhere you go
Christmas night in Harlem
(Jack) Black and tans feelin' mighty good
In that old coloured neighbourhood
Here and now be it understood
Christmas night in Harlem
(Johnny) Ev'ryone is gonna sit up
Until after three
Ev'ryone will be all lit up
Like a Christmas tree
(Jack) Come on now ev'ry coal black Joe
You just lead me t'the mistletoe
With a kiss and a hi-de-ho
Christmas night in Harlem
(Johnny) Hee Hee, man, Dog, what'd Santa Claus leave in your stockin'?
(Jack) Let me see, there's an orange, a jar of Kink-Out and Man, look at this slide trombone
(Johnny) Yeah, but it might not sound so pretty, let me hear you tune it
(Jack) Mr Mercer, I'm glad to be
Back in this festivity
(Johnny) Ah, you said it Mr T
It's Christmas night in Harlem
(Jack) Well it's Christmas night in Harlem
Man, you drew the pitful

It's Hard To Be Humble
Composer(s): MacDavis
Performer(s): MacDavis



Oh Lord it's hard to be humble
When you're perfect in every way
I can't wait to look in the mirror 
'cause I get better looking each day
To know me is to love me
I must be a hell of a man
Oh Lord it's hard to be humble 
But I'm doing the best that I can

I used to have a girlfriend 
But I guess she just couldn't compete
With all of these love-starved women 
Who keep clamouring at my feet
Well, I probably could find me another 
But I guess they're all in awe of me
Who cares--I never get lonesome 
'cause I treasure my own company

Oh Lord it's hard to be humble
When you're perfect in every way
I can't wait to look in the mirror 
'cause I get better looking each day
To know me is to love me
I must be a hell of a man
Oh Lord it's hard to be humble 
But I'm doing the best that I can

I guess you could say I'm a loner 
A cowboy outlaw tough and proud
Oh I could have lots of friends if I want 'em 
But then I wouldn't stand out in a crowd
Some folks say that I'm egotistical 
Hell, I don't even know what that means
But I think it has something to do with the way 
That I fill out my skin-tight blue-jeans

Oh Lord it's hard to be humble
When you're perfect in every way
I can't wait to look in the mirror 
'cause I get better looking each day
To know me is to love me
I must be a hell of a man
Oh Lord it's hard to be humble 
But I'm doing the best that I can

Christmas Memories
Composer(s): Joey Miskulin
Performer(s): Frankie Yankovic



Hello, this is 'Weird Al' Yankovic
You know, some of my favorite memories
are those of Christmastime
I still remember when I was a little boy, just waiting for the big day
Mom would be cooking up a mess of boysenberry 
and tunafish burritos for our big Christmas dinner 
and dad would be decorating the tree with little bits of Spam
And then, the big day would finally arrive
I'd stay up all night and wait for Santa 
a-a-and when he finally showed up
we'd all hold his hands down in the waffle maker 
until he promised to give us everything we wanted
Ah, yeah, those were the days
Well, Merry Christmas everybody, and, let's do lunch

It's Hard To Be A Saint In The City
Composer(s): Bruce Springsteen
First release by: Bruce Springsteen - 1973



I had skin like leather and the diamond-hard look of a cobra
I was born blue and weathered but I burst just like a supernova
I could walk like Brando right into the sun, then dance just like a Casanova
With my blackjack and jacket and hair slicked sweet
Silver star studs on my duds, just like a Harley in heat
When I strut down the street, I could feel its heart beat
The sisters fell back and said, "Don't that man look pretty"
The cripple on the corner cried out, "Nickels for your pity"
Them gasoline boys downtown sure talk gritty
It's so hard to be a saint in the city

I was the king of the alley, Mama, I could talk some trash
I was the prince of the paupers, crowned downtown at the beggar's bash
I was the pimp's main prophet, I kept everything cool
Just a backstreet gambler with the luck to lose
And when the heat came down it was left on the ground
The devil appeared like Jesus through the steam in the street
Showin' me a hand I knew even the cops couldn't beat
I felt his hot breath on my neck as I dove into the heat
It's so hard to be a saint when you're just a boy out on the street

And the sages of the subway sit just like the living dead
As the tracks clack out the rhythm, their eyes fixed straight ahead
They ride the line of balance and hold on by just a thread
But it's too hot in these tunnels, you can get hit up by the heat
You get up to get out at your next stop, but they push you back in your seat
Your heart starts beatin' faster as you struggle to your feet
Then you're outa that hole and back up on the street

And them South Side sisters sure look pretty
The cripple on the corner cries out, "Nickels for your pity"
And them downtown boys sure talk gritty
It's so hard to be a saint in the city

Christmas Memories
Composer(s): Alan Bergman - Marilyn Bergman - Don Costa
Performer(s): Frank Sinatra
and multiple other artists



Singing carols, stringing popcorn
Making footprints in the snow
Memories, Christmas memories
They're the sweetest ones I know

Cookies baking in the kitchen
Carols in rhythm everywhere
Precious, Christmas memories
Float like snowflakes in the air

Oh the joy of waking Christmas morning
The family 'round the tree
We had a way of making Christmas morning
As merry as can be

I close my eyes and see shining faces
Of all the children who now have children of their own
Funny, but comes December
And I remember every Christmas I've known

It's Happening To You
Composer(s): John Prine; John Burns 
Performer(s): John Prine; Chris Hillman



Well it's the same old song
Boy meets girl
And girl meets boy
They carry on
They close their eyes
And kiss until the world is gone
Oh yes it's true
It's happening to you

You know what they say
They pledge their love forever
Then they add a day
They hold their hands so tight
In the fear
That one might stray
Oh yes it's true
It's happening to you

I loved her
She loved me too
We had a lot of love
Now it's all through

And for a while
Their hearts beat one
As they match each other
Smile for smile
They dance away the night
As they praise
The others style
Oh yes it's true
It's happening to you

Christmas Memories
Composer(s): Randy Albright - John Greenebaum - Becky Hobbs
Performer(s): Alabama; Groovegrass Boyz; Eddie Kamae



There's a blanket of snow coverin' up the old road
To the house where I was raised
Through the window I see the lights on the tree
And a glow from the old fireplace
Though it all looks the same, so much has changed
From the way it used to be

Christmas memories of happy years gone by
They come back to me and keep me warm inside
Still those memories make me cry

Now the stockings are filled, the oldhouse is still
And the kids are dreamin' away
There's that old easy chair, me and Daddy sat there
Waiting for Santa's sleigh
Now Daddy's gone, but we'll carry on
'Cause the little ones still need

Christmas memories of happy years gone by
They come back to me and keep me warm inside
Still those Christmas memories
Oh, they mean so much to me
Woh, those Christmas memories make me cry

It's Happened To Me
Composer(s): Les Chadwick; Gerry Marsden
Performer(s): Gerry & The Pacemakers



People tell you that you can't find love 
Or you'll never find your turtle dove 
Don't believe a word of what they say 
'Cause when I met you, my love 
I knew, I knew it had happened to me 
It's happened to me 

You can tell by the way I walk 
Or even tell it when I talk 
& I'm so proud it's plain to see 
'Cause when I met you, my love 
I knew, I knew it had happened to me 
It's happened to me 

I don't mind telling everyone 
I'm proud to say you're my only one 

(x2): 
So if they you that you can't find love 
Or you'll never find your turtle dove 
Don't believe a word of what they say 
'Cause when I met you, my love 
I knew, I knew it had happened to me 
It's happened to me 
It's happened to me 

Christmas Man Blues
Composer(s): Rev. Thomas A. Dorsey
Performer(s): Bertha "Chippie" Hill



Won't somebody have mercy on poor me?
Won't somebody have mercy on poor me?
I ain't got nobody to trim my Christmas tree

Santa Claus is comin', my stockings hangin' on the wall
Santa Claus is comin', my stockings hangin' on the wall
If you can't bring me a man, don't bring nothing at all

Santa oh Santa, bring me a full-grown man
Santa oh Santa, bring me a full-grown man
If you ain't got a good one, Santa do the best you can

You find me weepin', everybody hear the news
You find me weepin', everybody hear the news
Bring me a man to cure these Christmas blues

It's Great To Be Alive
Composer(s): Johnny Mercer; Robert Emmett Dolan
Performer(s): Jo Stafford



It's great to be alive
To work from nine to five
To have a piece of land to farm

It's great to be alive
To have a car to drive
And have your baby on your arm

In spite of bills
And other minor ills
Somehow we manage to survive

It's great to be in love
To have a roof above
And watch the little ones around

Your own descendant
Deductable dependents
It's great to be alive

It's great to be alive
(It's great to be here and kickin')
To work from nine to five
(To hear an alarm clock tickin')
And have a piece of land to farm
(It's really a kick to cultivate chickens on a little ol' farm)

It's great to be alive
(It's up to work and strivin')
To have a car to drive
(Then take your girl to a drive-in)
And swing your baby on your arm
(To know that at five you're really arrivin', she'll be holding your arm)

In spite of bills
(Even though the bills just pile up by the million)
And other minor ills
(We manage to find the proper pills)
Somehow me manage to survive
(To lose the little ills, straight, that really is great)

It's great to be alive
(That girl to love you)
To have a roof above
(That roof above you
To watch the little ones arrive)
(Especially with the little ones arrivin' and all that jive)

Your own descendants
(Your descendants)
Deductable dependents
(In attendance)

It's great, it's great to be alive
We're livin', thanksgivin'
It's great to be alive

The Bailiff's Daughter Of Islington
(Traditional)



There was a youth, and a well belov'd youth
And he was a esquire's son
He loved the bailiff's daughter dear
That lived in Islington

She was coy, and she would not believe
That he did love her so
No, nor at any time she would
Any countenance to him show

But when his friends did understand
His fond and foolish mind
They sent him up to fair London
An apprentice for to bind

And when he had been seven long years
And his love he had not seen
Many a tear have I shed for her sake
When she little thought of me

All the maids of Islington
Went forth to sport and play
All but the bailiff's daughter dear
She secretly stole away

She put off her gown of gray
And put on her puggish attire
She's up to fair London gone
Her true-love to require

As she went along the road
The weather being hot and dry
There was she aware of her true-love
At length come riding by

She stept to him, as red as any rose
And took him by the bridle ring
"I pray you, kind sir, give me one penny
To ease my weary limb"

"I prithee, sweetheart, canst thou tell me
Where that thou wast born?"
"At Islington, kind sir," said she
"where I have had many a scorn"

"I prithee, sweetheart, canst thou tell me
Whether thou dost know
The bailiff's daughter of Islington?"
"She's dead, sir, long ago"

"Then will I sell my goodly steed
My saddle and my bow
I will into some far country
Where no man doth me know"

"O stay, O stay, thou goodly youth!
She's alive, she is not dead
Here she standeth by thy side
And is ready to be thy bride" 

It's Good To Be The King
Composer(s): Mel Brooks; Pete Wingfield
First performance: Mel Brooks - 1981



Now get down people
And listen to me
Gonna tell you how I made history
You can call me Louis
I'm the king of France
Check out my story
While you do your dance
Now it's seventeen hundred and eighty nine
The peasants were starving
But I was fine
We were hanging out
Down in old Versailles
That's the weekend pad of my queen and I
In the alleys of Paris
They was eating rats
But it was fillet mignon
For the aristocrats
There was Dukes and Counts and 
Barons and Earls
I gave them the title
But I kept the girl
Blond, redhead, wild, brunette
Ladies in wait
I didn't wait to get
There was truffles for breakfast
Toast for brunch
The lion of the folley's version for lunch...

Ooh yes it's good to be the king
Ooh la la
Gee but it's good to be the king

Say it girls

You can be sure about one thing
Ooh la la
Mais oui, it's good to be the king

It's good to be the king

Well the palace was rocking
And we were doing it good
When we heard there was some trouble
In the neighborhood
I wasn't too worried
No big deal
We step out of line
Jack, you're near the Bastille
The party kept spinning
All day an dall night
The champagne was flowing
We were feeling all right
They were screaming for breath
Things started to shake
But Marie Antoinette said,
"We'll let 'em eat cake."
Now the rapper wouldn't have it
They was angry and beat
They built a big old razor
Called the Guillotine
Then the people all shouted
We'll have all day
Down with dirty war
Give us Perrier
I said that in the war things might get screwy
But they'd never lay a finger
On good king Louis
Just keep your cool
Don't fret, don't freak
Say hey
Say what
Say magnifico

Ooh yes it's good to be the king
Ooh la la
Gee but it's good to be the king

Your fantasy is my reality

You can be sure about one thing
Ooh la la
Mais oui, it's good to be the king

It's good to be the king

Night and day
Vous, vous voulez

Well they broke down the gate
In one massive assault
And the party came to a grinding halt
They took the midgets and the freakies
With the girls in tote
And a voice said
Louis, it's time to go
They put my neck on the block
They took off my wig
And it occured to me
This was the end of the gig
They asked me did I have any
Last words to say
Well I raised my head
And I hollered hey

Ooh yes it's good to be the king
Ooh la la
Gee but it's good to be the king

Well c'est la vie
Make that one more

You can be sure about one thing
Ooh la la
Mais oui, it's good to be the king

It's good to be the king

Bonjour
Ooh la la
Ooh yes, it's good to be the king

Well it was good while it lasted

Christmas Letter
Performer(s): Sonny James



When it's Christmas time in heaven
Do the angels trim the tree?
And if angels sing Christmas carols
Please ask them, sing one for me

Folks, I'm a tired old postman
Then Christmas eve is here
And I guess I've been kind of grumpy
'Cause the load's been mighty heavy this year

But this morning I picked up a letter
Written in childish scrawl
It said "to my daddy in heaven"
With no return address at all

"Dear daddy" I read
"I miss you so much tonight
Christmas eve is near
Always before this at Christmas
You been living down here
The carols we sang together at night by the open fire
Are you singing them tonight, daddy
To all the kids up there?
I couldn't buy you presents
So I'm lighting a Christmas candle tonight
And I hope when you read my letter
That you look down and see the light
I'll close for now
'Cause I'm crying and I can't see to write
But don't grieve, they're happy tears, daddy
Still I'll miss you, tomorrow on Christmas eve"

When it's Christmas time in heaven
Do the angels trim the tree?
And if angels sing Christmas carols
Please ask them, sing one for me

I folded the letter and put it away
While I brushed aside a tear
Somehow I knew for certain
That there'd been a daddy to hear

'Cause all at once in the distant south
I saw a shining white light
And from far, far away were voices like bells
A great choir sang silent night

When it's Christmas time in heaven
Do the angels trim the tree?
And if angels sing Christmas carols
Please ask them, sing one for me

It's Gonna Work Out Fine
Composer(s): Robert Lee McCoy; Sylvia McKinney
First release by: Ike & Tina Turner - 1961



Darling (yes Tina) it's time to get next to me
(honey that was my plan from the very beginning)
Darling (un huh) I never thought that this could be
(What you mean) Oh yeah
Your lips set my soul on fire
You could be my one desire
Oh darling (yes yes) I think it's gonna work out fine
(It's gonna work out fine)
I wanna tell you something Ike
Ike, I went to see the preacher man
(The preacher man, you must be losin your mind)
I started (strated what) I started making wedding plans
(Oh really) oh yeah
If your love is half as true As the love I offer you
Oh darling (yes yes) I think it's gonna work out fine
(It's gonna work out fine)
I keep a tellin ya (I think it's gonna work out fine)
I get the feelin it's a (gonna work out fine)
I keep a tellin you (I know it's gonna work out fine)
I'm so glad that you're mine all mine
Remember (remember what) I used to call you dapper Dan
(Yeah those were the good ole days)
But killer, forever and a lovin man (that's me) oh yeah
A whole lot of love just to be your speed
But now pretty daddy I'm all you need
Oh darling (yes yes) I know it's gonna work out fine
(It's gonna work out fine)
I keep a tellin ya (I think it's gonna work out fine)
I get the feelin it's a (gonna work out fine)
I keep a tellin you (I know it's gonna work out fine)
I want you to know it's gonna work out fine ...

Christmas Island
Composer(s): Lyle Moraine
Performer(s): The Andrew Sisters
and multiple other artists



Let's get away from sleigh bells, let's get away from snow 
Let's make a break some Christmas, Dear, I know the place to go 
How'd ya like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island? 
How'd ya like to spend the holiday away across the sea? 
How'd ya like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island? 
How'd ya like to hang a stocking on a great big coconut tree? 

How'd ya like to stay up late, like the islanders do? 
Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe
If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island 
You will never stray for everyday 
Your Christmas dreams come true

How'd ya like to stay up late like the islanders do? 
Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe 
If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island 
You will never stray, for everyday 
Your Christmas dreams come true 
On Christmas Island your dreams come true

It's Gonna Be All Right
Composer(s): Gerry Marsden
First release by: Gerry & The Pacemakers - 1964
Covered by: The Stool Pigeons - 1997



It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

The day you came my way
I knew I would stay
Close by your side
To keep you staisfied

It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

When you look at me
In your eyes I can see
The love that grows each day
That's why I've gotta say

It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

Never thought I'd find a girl like you
Now I have, I know I'll never be blue
It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

Every time we meet
My heart skips a beat
And now you're here to stay
You'll always hear me say

It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

Never thought I'd find a girl like you
Now I have, I know I'll never be blue
It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right

Every time we meet
My heart skips a beat
And now you're here to stay
You'll always hear me say

It's gonna be all right, all right, all right
It's gonna be all right
It's gonna be all right
It's gonna be all right
It's gonna be all right

Christmas Is Now Drawing Near At Hand
(Traditional)
Performer(s): Steve Winwood; Lal Waterson



Christmas is now drawing near at hand
Come serve the Lord and be at His command
And God a portion for you will provide
And give a blessing to your soul besides

Down in the garden where flowers growing ranks
Down on your bended knees and give the Lord thanks
Down on your knees and pray both night and day
Leave off your sins and live fro' pray tae pray

So proud and lofty is some sort of sin
Which many take delight and pleasure in
Whose conversation God doth smirch as lie
And yet He shakes His sword before He stri'

So proud and lofty do some people go
Dressing theirselves like players in a show
They patch and paint and dress with idle stuff
As if God had not made 'em fine enough

Even little children learn to curse and swear
And can't rehearse one word of godly prayer
Oh teach them better, oh teach them to rely
On Christ the sinner's friend who reigns on high

Christmas Is Near
Composer(s): Jeanette Wormald



When the spinifex flowers and harvest begins
We know that Christmas is near
When the bitumen shimmers in summer's heat haze
We know that Christmas is near
When the grain trucks cue at the silos
And our town comes alive with its lights
Like small coloured jewels, they sparkle
In the warmth of a December night

So here's to Christmas, red ochre plains and opal blue skies
Late summer evenings and cockatoo dawns
When spirits and temperatures rise
So here's to Christmas, grey kangaroos, the currawong sings
We gather together beneath southern stars
To remember the birth of our King

When cicadas sing harmony in eucalyptus
We know that Christmas is near
When Sunday Schools practise nativity plays
We know that Christmas is near
When the kitchen is busy with baking
Sights and smells of Christmas delights
And friends and families gather, to celebrate into the night

It's Going To Take Some Time
Composer(s): Carole King; Toni Stern
First release by: Carole King - 1971
Covered by multiple other artists



It's gonna' to take some time this time 
to get myself in shape 
I really fell outta line this time 
I really missed the gate 
the birds on the telephone line (this time) 
are calling out to me (this time) 
and I won't be so blind next time and I'll find some harmony 

and it's gonna' to take some time this time 
no matter what I plan 
and like the young trees 
in the winter time 
I'll learn how to bend 
after all the tears we've shed 
how could we make amends 
so it's one more round for experience 
and I'm on the road again..... 
and it's gonna' to take some time, this time..... 

after all the tears we've shed 
how could we make amends 
so it's one more round for experience 
and I'm on the road again... 
and it's gonna' to take some time 
this time........