If I Were Father Christmas
Composer(s): Harry Hemsley
Performer(s): Harry Hemsley



If I were Father Christmas, and through the park should pass
I'd alter all the "please keep off" to "please keep on" the grass
And "do not pick the flowers", this notice makes me wild
I'd alter it to "help yourself"
These flowers are yours my child

If I were Father Christmas, I'd hit upon a scheme
To make all nasty medicines, taste just like lovely cream
The pills would taste like bulls-eyes, and castor-oil would smell
And taste like lovely honey, and
You'd long to be unwell

If I were Father Christmas, I'd look around for me
And load myself with heaps of toys, not merely two or three
Lots of aeroplanes, and cycles, and boats and ships a fleet
Some railway trains and motor cars
And heaps of tuck to eat