Belgium Put The Kibosh On The Kaiser
Composer(s): Ellerton
Performer(s): Mark Sheridan



A silly German sausage
Dreamt Napoleon he'd be
Then he went and broke his promise
It was made in Germany
He shook hands with Britannia
And eternal peace he swore
Naughty boy, he talked of peace
While he prepared for war

He stirred up little Serbia
To serve his dirty tricks
But naughty nights at LiIge
Quite upset this Dirty Dick.
His luggage labeled 'England'
And his programme nicely set
He shouted 'First stop Paris'
But he hasn't got there yet

For Belgium put the kibosh on the Kaiser
Europe took the stick and made him sore
On his throne it hurts to sit
And when John Bull starts to hit
He will never sit upon it any more

His warships sailed upon the sea
They looked a pretty sight
But when they heard the bulldog bark
They disappeared from sight
The Kaiser said 'Be careful
If by Jellicoe they're seen
Then every man-of-war I've got
Will be a submarine'

We chased his ship to Turkey
And the Kaiser startled stood
Schratch'd his head and said 'Don't hurt
You see I'm touching wood'
Thewn Turkey brought her warships
Just to aid the German plot
Be careful, Mr Turkey
Or you'll do the Turkey Trot

Belgium put the kibosh on the Kaiser
Europe took the stick and made him sore
And if Turkey makes a stand
She'll get ghurka'd and japanned
And it won't be Hoch the Kaiser any more

He'll have to go to school again
And learn his geography
He quite forgot Britannia
And the hands across the sea
Australia and Canada
the Russian and the Jap
And England looked so small
He couldn't see her on the map

Whilst Ireland seemed unsettled
'Ah' said he 'I'll settle John'
But he didn't know the Irish
Like he knew them later on
Though the Kaiser stirred the lion
Please excuse him for the crime
His lunatic attendant
Wasn't with him at the time

For Belgium put the kibosh on the Kaiser
Europe took the stick and made him sore
We shall shout with victory's joy
Hold your hand out, naughty boy
You must never play at soldiers any more

For Belgium put the kibosh on the Kaiser
Europe took the stick and made him sore
On his throne it hurts to sit
And when John Bull starts to hit
He will never sit upon it any more