A Little Bit Of Cucumber
Composer(s): T.W. Connor
Performer(s): Harry Champion



I was weaned on cucumber
And on my wedding day
Sitting down to supper when
The guests had gone away
My old darling said to me
"You must be hungry, Joe! 
What is it you fancy?" I
Said, "Fancy! Don't you know?"

I went flying in the air
With my old college chum 
Suddenly he said to me
"We're bound for kingdom come!
Is there anything on your mind 
Before you wear a crown?"
I began to shake and said
"Write this confession down

To the Lord Mayor's Banquet I 
Got in one foggy day
When I saw the grub it took
My appetite away
"Sparrowgrass" and chaffinches 
And pigs-head stuffed with jam! 
I said to the waiter there
"You don't know who I am!"

Sev'ral years of married life 
Have brought me lots of joys
I don't know how many girls
I think it's fourteen boys
When the last one came to town 
It nearly turned my head
It was marked with a cucumber
And the fust words that it said

Were:

"I like pickled onions
I like piccalilli
Pickled cabbage is alright
With a bit of cold meat on Sunday night
I can go termartoes
But what I do prefer
Is a little bit of cu-cum-cu-cum-cu-cum
Little bit of cucumber"