A Little Bit Off The Top
Performer(s): Harry Bedford



Brown's a very old friend of mine
Once I went to his house to dine
Some of the aristocracy were there
Ev'ryone of 'em thought me "great"
And said, when they saw me lick my plate
That I must be an American millionaire
The waiter came into the room with a beautiful lump of pork
And though I'd "wolfed" enough to feed a town
I thought I'd like a sample of the crackling and the gravy
So I loosened out my vest and said to Brown

Carve a little bit off the top for me! for me!
Just a little bit off the top for me! for me!
Saw me off a yard or two, I'll tell you when to stop
All I want is a little bit off the top!

Once I made up my mind to roam
And spend a week by the briny foam
I'd never been far away from home before
Ev'ryone of the family
Were sorry indeed to part with me
They all love Willie, especially ma-in-law
They all came up and asked me for a lock of my golden hair
I clipped 'em from the back and from the side
At last I asked the missus which particular bit she fancied
And she rubbed her nose and lovingly replied

Tear a little bit off the top for me! for me!
Just a little bit off the top for me! for me!
I'll fix it on the copperstick and use it for a mop
All I want is a little bit off the top!