Stuck On You
Composer(s): Ray Stevens
Performer(s): Ray Stevens



Well it all started back
About a week or two
I bought this instant Wonder Glue
I'd seen it work on TV and I just had to try me some

Well when I got home
I spilled the stuff
And I reached for a towel to wipe it up
And that towel stuck to my hand like another thumb

And as if that wasn't trouble enough
Here come Rover chasing Fluff

And that cat jumped up
And stuck right to my knee

(He doesn't have a knee!)

Well I reached down to hold the dog away
And I touched his ear and that's where my hand stayed
And he lit out a yelping dragging the cat and me

Well running through the house
We knocked the bird cage down

And the parakeet got loose and was flying all around
And finally landed and stuck to the top of my head

And I was tryin' to be careful, but I just wasn't able
And we were stickin' to ashtrays, lamps n tables
And I was wishin' that I had bought a roll
Of Duct Tape instead

Well I finally fell exhausted into a chair
And then you came in and found me there
With the bird on my head and my hand on the dog
And the cat stuck to my knee

And you said the scene looked
Heaven sent that I looked like a man perfectly content
A regular St. Francis of Asissi
And before I could stop you 
You laid a big kiss on me

Now Honey, I'm stuck on you
Yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog
And stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of
Instant Wonder Glue
Everything has stuck on me
And now I'm stuck on you

Well I got to thinkin' sittin' there that day
How did they make that stuff anyway
I mean there must be workers
Stuck all over the factory

I bet there's shoes on the floor and shirts on the walls
And hat's on the ceiling and all up and down the halls
Why just gettin' this stuff in the tube
Has got to be a miracle to see

Now if we could ever make it to the telephone
And get the paramedics out to our home
Maybe they could surgically remove you and the dog
And the cat and the parakeet

And as soon as we're all healed up enough
We're gonna sneak into the plant where they make that stuff
And for revenge we'll put instant Wonder Glue
On all their toilet seats

Hee Hee Hee ...

Until then I'm stuck on you
Yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog
And stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of Instant Wonder Glue
Everything has stuck on me and now I'm stuck on you
Ohhh, I'm stuck on you, yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog and stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of Instant Wonder Glue
Everything has stuck on me and now I'm stuck on you