The Bragging Song 
(aka "I Was Born Ten Thousand Years Ago"; "I Was Born About Ten Thousand Years Ago"; "I Was Borned About Four Thousand Years Ago"; "The Liar")
(Traditional)
Performer(s): Kelly Harrell
and multiple other artists



I was born ten thousand years ago
And there's nothing in this world that I don't know
I saw Pater, Paul, and Moses playing ring around the roses
And I'll lick the guy that say it isn't so

I saw Satan when he looked the garden o'er
I saw Eve and Adam driven from the door
And behind the bushes peepin', saw the apple they were eatin'
And I swear that I'm the guy that ate the core

I saw Jonah when he was within the whale
And thought he'd never live to tell the tale
But old Jonah'd eaten garlic, and he gave the whale the colic
So he coughed him up and let him out of jail

I saw Israel in the battle of the Nile
The arrows were flying thick and fast and wild
I saw David with his sling pop Goliath on the wing
I was doing forty seconds to the mile

I saw Sampson when he laid the village cold
Saw Daniel tame the lions in their hold
I helped build the Tower of Babel up as high as they were able
And there's many other things I haven't told

I taught Soloman his little A-B-C's
I helped Brigham Young to make limberger cheese
And while sailing down the bay with Methusala one day
I saved his flowing whiskers from the breeze

Queen Elizabeth, she fell in love with me
We were married in Milwaukee secretly
But I schemed around and shook her, then she went with General Hooker
To shoot mosquitoes down in Tenessee

I remember when the country had a king
I saw Cleopatra pawn her wedding ring
And I saw th flags a'flyin' when George Washington stopped lyin'
On the night when Patty first begin to sing

So, you see I am an educated man
To keep my brains in my head I plan
Cause I been on earth so long, that I use to sing a song
While Abraham and Issac played the band

I was born ten thousand years ago
And there's nothing in this world that I don't know
I saw Peter, Paul and Moses playing ring-around-the-roses
And I can lick the guy that says it is'nt so