The Gasman Cometh
Performer(s): Flanders & Swann



'Twas on the Monday morning, the Gas man came to call
The gas tap wouldn't turn - I wasn't getting gas at all
He tore out all the skirting boards to try and find the main
And I had to call the carpenterto put them back again
Oh, it all makes work for the working men to do

'Twas on the Tuesday morning. the Carpenter came round
He hammered, and he chiselled, and he said "Look what I've found
Your joists are full of dry rot, but I'll put them all to rights"
Then he nailed right through a cable and out went all the lights
Oh, it all makes work for the working men to do

'Twas on the Wednesday morning the Electrician came
He called me 'Mister Sanderson', which isn't quite my name
He couldn't reach the fuse box without standing on the bin
And his boot went thru a window, so I called a glazier in
Oh, it all makes work for the working men to do

'Twas on the Thursday morning the Glazier came round
With his blowtorch and his putty and his merry glazier sound
He put another pane in - it took no time at all 
Then I had to get a painter in to come and paint the wall
Oh, it all makes work for the working men to do

'Twas on the Friday morning the Painter made a start
With undercoats, and overcoats, he painted every part
Every nook and cranny, but I found when he had gone
He'd painted over the gas tap, and I couldn't turn it on!
Oh, it all makes work for the working men to do

On Saturday and Sunday they do no work at all
So it was on the Monday morning that the Gas man came to call