The Laughing Policeman
Composer(s): Billy Grey
Performer(s): Charles Penrose; Tiny Tim
I know a fat old policeman
He's always on our street
A fat and jolly red-faced man
He really is a treat
He's too kind for a policeman
He's never known to frown.
And everybody says
He is the happiest man in town!
He laughs upon point duty
He laughs upon his beat
He laughs at everybody
When he's walking in the street
He never can stop laughing
He says he's never tried
But once he did arrest a man
And laughed until he cried!
Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
His jolly face is wrinkled
And then he shut his eyes
He opened his great big mouth
It was a wonderous size!
He said "I must arrest you!"
He didn't know what for
And then he started laughing
Until he cracked his fat old jaw
Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
So if you chance to meet him
While walking 'round the town
Shake him by his fat old hand
And give him half a crown
His eyes will beam and sparkle
He'll gurgle with delight
And then you'll start him laughing
With all his blessed might!
Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
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