The Raspberry Song ((aka Everything Is Fresh Today (Jack Hodges))
Composer(s): Milligan
Performer(s): The Goons



(Moriarty) 
Oh, oh! Let me out -- my only crime is eating 

(Secombe) 
Don't worry -- I'll give the screws a song 
The warden won't mind 

(Bloodnok) 
No -- he's doing bird as well 
Maestro 

(Moriarty) 
Take your partners for the ball and chain one step 
One, two, three 

(Bloodnok) 
May I have this dance warden, you can hold my ball 

(Secombe) 
In a little prison where I'm locked in there is a most pecular fellow 
His name is Eccles and he's is in cell nine 
But his voice is soft and mellow 
He keeps a fruit cart in his cell, and all the convicts knows it 
He doesn't sing or rave about his fruit -- he simply blows it 

(Bloodnok) 
He's doing it all night long 

(Secombe) 
It's better than any song 
No, it isn't very pretty, but you've got to admit it's cute 

(Bloodnok) 
Never, never 

(Secombe) 
So all together let it go -- eat more fruit! 

(Bloodnok) 
Don't tell me he's come to stay 

(Secombe) 
Let the wardens hear him say 
Fruit's in season! Let's be merry! 
Apples, plums and the old raspberry 
Everything is fresh today 

(Bloodnok) 
Don't let him get near me, please! 

(Secombe) 
Every Friday night when work is done 
He does not wastes a minute 
To the prison warden he hurries 'round where he sings just like a linnet 
To hear him blow a melody its great, you can't deny it 
And if you've nothing else to do, we'd like the screws to try it 

(Bloodnok) 
No more, please! 

(Secombe) 
Get ready and do it now 

(Eccles) 
The crazy man, you know how 

(Bloodnok) 
God knows it isn't very pretty 

(Secombe) 
You've got to admit it's cute 

(Bloodnok) 
Well...

(Secombe) 
All together let it go -- eat more fruit 

(Bloodnok) 
There isn't a cure they say! 

(Secombe) 
Let the screws all hear him say

(Eccles) 
Don't eat farm laid [wow!] 

(Secombe) 
Every thing is fresh today 

(Bluebottle) 
Hello everybody, remember me, Bluebottle? 
I'm fourteen now and I have got boils...
Though I don't look very pretty, I'm wearing my new brown suit
The only trouble with it is when I go outside I'm struck by fruit

(Bloodnok) 
Don't point him at him I say 

(Secombe) 
It's a treat to hear him play 
Fruit's in season, plums and berries 
Apples, pears and the old raspberry 

(All) 
Everything is fresh to day 

(Bloodnok) 
Someone open a window, please!