Sewers Of The Strand
Composer(s): Spike Milligan
Performer(s): Spike Milligan; The Goons



Phew! Yes folks, I can understand their feelings because they are about to play

Sideways through the sewers of the Strand on a Sunday afternoon 
Sideways through the sewers of the Strand will be our honeymoon 

Ankle deep folks in sludge dear we'll walk hand in hand 
They do say that the sewers of the Strand are the finest in the land 

Sideways through the sewers of the Strand will be paradise for two 
Who cares if the atmosphere is blue 

'Cause there's nothing wrong with a good old British pong 
Sideways through the sewers of the Strand with you...

Ah my darling little bride
We meet by accident, folks -- she ran over me with a tram 

Her name was Buler, mine was Jim
I was glad they called me Jim, folks, because that was my name 

I found that she had been going out with an Irish dentist called Phil McCavity 
He walked with a pronounced limp -- l-i-m-p pronounced limp, folks 
Oh the worry turned me grey
This gave me a strange appearance as I was bald at the time
Ah, the first time I met her was late early one morning in Spring 
There was a heavy dew on the grass -- he had just been thrown out of a synagogue for eating during the sermon 
I told her 'Darling, let me take you away from the squalor you live in, and live in the squalor I live in' 
So, we were married in the Spring, folks 
We had the reception in the pond 
There was plenty to drink folks 
And then off we went! Folks! 
Sideways through those naughty sewers of the naughty 
Strand will be a paradise for two (not one but two, folks) 
Who cares if the atmosphere is blue (phew!) 
'Cause there's nothing wrong (is there) with a good old old British Pong! 
Sideways through the sewers of the Strand with you 
I don't mean maybe...