They're Either Too Young Or Too Old Composer(s): Frank Loesser - Arthur Schwartz Performer(s): Bette Davis and multiple other artists
You rushed away and left this house as empty as can be And I am like the driftwood in a deadly calm at sea I can't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but thee For there is no secret lover that the draft board didn't discover
They're either too young or too old They're either too gray or too grassy green The pickings are poor and the crop is lean What's good is in the Army, what's left will never harm me
They're either too old or too young So, darling, you'll never get stung Tomorrow I'll go hiking with that Eagle Scout unless I get a call from grandpa for a snappy game of chess
They're either too warm or too cold They're either to fast or too fast asleep So, darling, believe me, I'm yours to keep They're isn't any gravy, the gravy's in the Navy
They're either too fresh or too stale There is no available male I will confess to one romance I'm sure you will allow He tried to serenade me, but his voice is changing now
They're either too bald or too bold I'm down to the wheelchair and bassinet My heart just refuses to get upset I simply can't compel it to, with no Marine to tell it to
I'm either their first breath of spring Or else, I'm their last little fling I either get a fossil or an adolescent pup I either have to hold him off or have to hold him up
The battle is on, but the fortress will hold They're either too young or too old
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