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Lyrics/Songteksten: Oldies A-Z

Retro-Songteksten: Evergreens, Classics, Old-Time Favourites, Hits Uit Onze Jeugd
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NON-profit, non-commercial blog, to help preserve the songs of our youth; hence for entertainment only.
All lyrics are the copyright of their respective owners; you are encouraged to go buy their music.

Your Horoscope For Today


Your Horoscope For Today
Composer(s): Weird Al Yankovic
Performer(s): Weird Al Yankovic



Aquarius!
There's travel in your future when your tounge
freezes to the back of a speeding bus
Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing
Whack-a-mole 17 hours a day

Pisces!
Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the Ebola Viruis
You are the true lord of the dance
No matter what those idiots at work say

Aries!

The look on your face will be priceless
when you find that 40 pound watermelon in your colon
Trade toothbrushes with an albino dwarf
And give a hickey to Maryil Streep

Taurus!
You will never find true happiness
What you gonna do, cry about it?
The stars predict that tomorrow you'll wake up
do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep

That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today

Gemini!
Your birthday party will be ruined once again
by your explosive flatulance
Your love life will run into trouble
when your fiancie throws a javilin through your chest

Cancer!
The position of Jupiter says that you should spend
the rest of the week face down in the mud
Try not to shove a roll of duct tape up your nose
while taking your driving test

Leo!
Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt
and tape it to your bosses face, oh no
Eat a bucket of tuna flavored pudding
and wash it down with a gallon of strawberry Quick

Virgo!
All Virgos are extremely friendly and intelligence
Except for you!
Expect a big suprise today
when you wind up with your head impaled upon a stick

That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today

Now you may find it inconciveable
or at the very least a bit unlikely
that the relitive position of the
planets and the stars could have
could a special deep significance
or meaning that exclusively applies to only you
But let me give you my assurance
that these forcasts and predictions
are all based on on solid scientific documented evidence
so you would have to be some kind of moron
not to realize that every single one
of them is absoultely true
Where was I?

Libra!
A big promotion is just around the corner
for someone much more talented than you!
Laughter is the very best medicine
remember that when your appendix bursts next week

Scorpio!
Get ready for an unexpected trip when
you fall screaming from an open window
Work a little bit harder on improving
you low self esteem, you stupid freak

Saggitarius!
All your friends are laughing behind your back
Kill Them....
Take down all the naked pictures of
Ernest Borgiene you've got hanging in your den

Capricorn!
The stars say you're a exciting and wonderful person
but you know they're lying
If I were you I'd lock my doors and windows
and never, never, never
never, never, leave my house again

That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today, for today-ay-ay-ay
That's your horoscope for today

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Swlabr


Swlabr
Composer(s): Pete Brown - Jack Bruce
Performer(s): Cream
and multiple other artists



Coming to me in the morning, leaving me at night
Coming to me in the morning, leaving me alone
You've got that rainbow feel but the rainbow has a beard

Running to me a-crying when he throws you out
Running to me a-crying, on your own again
You've got that pure feel, such good responses
But the picture has a moustache

You're coming to me with that soulful look on your face
Coming looking like you've never ever done one wrong thing

You're coming to me with that soulful look on your face
You're coming looking like you've never ever done one wrong thing

So many fantastic colours; I feel in a wonderland
Many fantastic colours makes me feel so good
You've got that pure feel, such good responses
You've got that rainbow feel but the rainbow has a beard

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Your Groovy Self


Your Groovy Self
Composer(s): Lee Hazelwood
Performer(s): Nancy Sinatra



Don't talk to strangers on the bus
You know that could be dangerous
Don't walk on sticks or stones
Don't answer ringin' phones
You know I've got to worry
'Til you bring your groovy self on home to me

Don't take up with no alley cats
They really don't know where it's at
Don't fall or trip on things
Stay away from happenings
You know I've got to worry
'Til you bring your groovy self on home, ummm, to me

(Instrumental Break)

Oooooohhh, be careful walkin' down the street
You never know what you might meet
Don't change a thing or two
I'm hung up child on you
And you know I've got to worry
Until you bring your groovy self on home to me

Get your groovy self on home

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The Swiss Maid


The Swiss Maid
Composer(s): Roger Miller
Performer(s): Del Shannon
and multiple other artists



One time a long time ago
On a mountain in Switzerland
Yo lo lo lo lo
There lived a fair young maiden
Lovely but lonely
Yo ho ho ho

Day after day she’d pine her heart away
Yo lo lo lo lo lo lady yay
‘Cause no love came her way

One day her papa say
Someday we’ll go down to the village in the valley
There you’ll meet a nice young man
He’ll ask for your hand
Then you’ll be happy

But every day she grew unhappier
On the mountain in Switzerland
Yo lo lo lo lo
Every day a little bit lonelier
Which way to turn, which way to go

And day after day she’d pine her heart away
Yo lo lo lo lo lo lady yay
But no love came her way

Some say the maiden’s dream never came true
She never got to go to the valley
If she did or not I really don’t know
Wo..ho..ho ho
Did she die unhappy

I’d rather think she found her love
Wouldn’t you rather think she did find love
Somewhere, someway
Yodel..lady..ay
Yodel…lady..ay

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Your Good Girl's Gonna Go Bad


Your Good Girl's Gonna Go Bad
Composer(s): Billy Sherrill; Glenn Sutton
Performer(s): Tammy Wynette;
and various other artists



I've never seen the inside of a Bar Room
Or listened to a Juke box all night long
But I see these are the things
that bring you pleasure
So I'm gonna make some changes in our home

Well I've heard it said if you can't beat 'em join 'em
so if that's the way you wanted me to be
Well if it takes that to keep you happy
From now on you're gonna see a different me

Chorus

Because your good girl's gonna go bad
I'm gonna be the swinginest swinger
you've ever had
If you like 'em painted up, powdered up,
then you oughta be glad
'cos your good girl's gonna go bad

I'll even learn to like the taste of whisky
In fact you'll hardly recognise your wife
I'll buy some brand new clothes and dress up fancy
For my journey to the wilder side of life

Chorus

Because your good girl's gonna go bad
I'm gonna be the swinginest swinger you ever had
If you like 'em painted up, powdered up
Then you oughta be glad 'cos your good girl's gonna go bad

Oh yea your good girl's gonna go bad

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The Swingin' Shepherd Blues


The Swingin' Shepherd Blues
Composer(s): Kenny Jacobson - Moe Koffman - Rhoda Roberts
Performer(s): Moe Koffman
and multiple other artists



Along a mountain pass
There is a patch of grass
Where the swingin' shepherd plays a tune

His sheep never stray
Dancin' all day
Til they see the pale and yellow moon

And then he leads his flock
And homeward they all rock
To the tune of the swingin' shepherd blues

Come home, shepherd
Play those haunting trills
Come home, shepherd
Let it echo through the hills

The swingin' shepherd blues

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Your Good For Nothing Heart


Your Good For Nothing Heart
Composer(s): Pat Noto; Webb Pierce
Eddie Scalzi; George Williams
Performer(s): Webb Pierce



Your good for nothing heart
Won't ever let to start
Loving someone who
Would forever be true

You don't know what you want it's plain
And you're driving me insane
As you go cheating cheating
Cheating round on me

Your good for nothing heart
I can't have any part
Now your love it seems
Cause I'm never in your dreams

Oh but someday you're gonna cry
You'll be lonely by and by
You won't think you're smart then
With your good for nothing heart

Your good for nothing heart

Your good for nothing heart ...

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Swingin' On The Moon


Swingin' On The Moon
Composer(s): Robert Bruce - Mel Tormé
Performer(s): Mel Tormé; Perry Danos; Nikki Yanofsky



Are you tired of summer nights and noons?
Do you yawn when they speak sunny Spain?
Could you live without ever seeing old Rangoon?
Then come with me and let's go swingin' on the moon

Have you had enough of London fog
New York snow and California smog?
Would you say "arrivederci" to Rome in June?
Then fly with me and let's go swingin' on the moon

Let's have a honeymoon on the moon, honey
Far from the noisy earth below
And if your mama asks "Why the moon" honey
Just tell her your feller has gone inter-stellar

Grab your hat and we'll head off in the blue
In a little rocket built for two
Baby, we're gonna blast off, and before we're through
We'll leave the cares that we know on terra firma below
While we go singin' and swingin' on the moon

Hey, let's grab a holiday on the moon, honey
Far from the hustle of the crowd
And if your folks ask about our house, honey
Tell mater and pater we live in the crater

We're really gonna enjoy a life of ease
Livin' on moonlight cocktails and green cheese
Mister and Missus Space Commuter, if you please
And in a few years we might produce our own satelite
While we go singin' and swingin' on the moon

Swingin' on the moon ... moonlight cocktail ...
Moonlight becomes you ... blue moon ...
Moon over Miami ... velvet moon ... how high the moon ...
Don't let the moon get away ... the moon was yellow ...

We're singin', we're swingin'

We're singin' and a swingin' on the moon

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Your Gold Teeth


Your Gold Teeth
Composer(s): Walter Becker; Donald Fagen
Performer(s): Steely Dan



Got a feeling I've been here before
Watching as you cross the killing floor
You know you'll have to pay it all
You'll pay today or pay tomorrow
You fasten up your beaded gown
Then you try to tie me down
Do you work it out one by one
Or played in combination
You throw out your gold teeth
Do you see how they roll
I have seen your iron and your brass
Can't you see it shine behind the glass
Your fortune is your roving eye
Your mouth and legs
Your gift for the runaround
Torture is the main attraction
I don't need that kind of action
You don't have to dance for me
I've seen your dance before
Do you throw out your gold teeth
Do you see how they roll

Tobacco they grow in Peking
In the Year of the Locust
You'll see a sad thing
Even Cathy Berberian knows
There's one roulade she can't sing
Dumb luck my friend
Won't suck me in this time

Got a feeling I've been here before
Won't you let me help you find the door
All you got to do is use
Your silver shoes
A gift for the runaround
Use your knack darlin'
Take one step back darlin'
There ain't nothing in Chicago
For a monkey woman to do
Do you throw out your gold teeth
Do you see how they roll

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Swinging On A Star


Swinging On A Star
((French Version: À Toi De Choisir (by Richard Anthony)) - 1964))
Composer(s): Johnny Burke - Jimmy Van Heusen
First release by: Bing Crosby & Williams Brothers - 1944
Covered by multiple other artists



Would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a mule?

A mule is an animal with long funny ears
Kicks up at anything he hears
His back is brawny but his brain is weak
He's just plain stupid with a stubborn streak
And by the way, if you hate to go to school
You may grow up to be a mule

Or would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a pig?

A pig is an animal with dirt on his face
His shoes are a terrible disgrace
He has no manners when he eats his food
He's fat and lazy and extremely rude
But if you don't care a feather or a fig
You may grow up to be a pig

Or would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a fish?

A fish won't do anything, but swim in a brook
He can't write his name or read a book
To fool the people is his only thought
And though he's slippery, he still gets caught
But then if that sort of life is what you wish
You may grow up to be a fish
A new kind of jumped-up slippery fish

And all the monkeys aren't in the zoo
Every day you meet quite a few
So you see it's all up to you
You can be better than you are
You could be swingin' on a star

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Your Flag Decal Won't Get You Into Heaven Anymore


Your Flag Decal Won't Get You Into Heaven Anymore
Composer(s): John Prine
Performer(s): John Prine



While digesting Reader's Digest
In the back of a dirty book store
A plastic flag, with gum on the back
Fell out on the floor
Well, I picked it up and I ran outside
Slapped on my window shield
And if I could see old Betsy Ross
I tell her how good I feel

Chorus:
But your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more
They're already overcrowded
From your dirty little war
Now Jesus don't like killin'
No matter what the reason's for
And your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more

Well, I went to the bank this morning
And the cashier he said to me
"If you join the Christmas club
We'll give you ten of them flags for free"
Well, I didn't mess around a bit
I took her up on what he said
And I stuck them stickers all over my car
And one on my wife's forehead

Repeat Chorus:

Well, I got my window shield so filled
With flags I couldn't see
So, I ran the car upside a curb
And right into a tree
By the time they got a doctor down
I was already dead
And I'll never understand why the man
Standing in the Pearly Gates said...

But your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more
We're already overcrowded
From your dirty little war
Now Jesus don't like killin'
No matter what the reason's for
And your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more

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À Toi De Choisir


À Toi De Choisir
((Adapted from: Swinging On A star (by Bing Crosby) - 1944)
Composer(s): Johnny Burke - Jimmy Van Heusen - Jacques Plante
Performer(s): Richard Anthony - 1964



Ma petite sœur bien aimée - oh oh oh
Viens un peu ici m'écouter - oh oh oh
Je t'aime bien mais tu me désoles - oh oh oh
Car tu ne fais rien à l'école !

À toi de choisir ce que tu veux devenir - ah oui alors
Quelqu'un dont on parle et qu'on admire - tout à fait d'accord
Ou simplement un petit animal qui ne sait rien et qui se tient très mal
Mais si tu prends la première solution - oui bien sûr
Tu dois apprendre tes leçons - je ne veux pas apprendre les leçons

Ma petite sœur bien aimée - oui oui
Prends conseil de ton frère aîné - je veux bien je veux bien
Pour trouver plus tard un mari - oh j'ai le temps
Faut savoir la géométrie - menteur

À toi de choisir ce que tu veux devenir
Mais il faut bûcher pour réussir - à qui le dis-tu
Savoir les chefs lieux des départements - tu le sais toi
Et conjuguer un verbe à tout les temps
Si l'on voyait que tu comptes sur tes doigts - comme toi
Tous tes copains riraient de toi - tu parles ils font tous comme moi
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh

Mais si tu fais bien tes devoirs
Tu n'as pas de crainte à avoir
Le succès te tendra les bras
Et moi je serai fier de toi - oh oh oh
Et moi je serai fier de toi - oh oh oh
Et moi je serai fier de toi - oh oh oh

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Your Feet's Too Big


Your Feet's Too Big
Composer(s): Ada Benson; Fred Fisher
Performer(s): Fats Waller;
and various other artists



Spoken:
Who's that walkin' 'round here?
Mercy!
Sounds like baby patter
Baby elephant patter, that's what I calls it

Say, up in Harlem, at a table for two
There were four of us, me, your big feet and you
From your ankles up, I say you sure are sweet
From there down, there's just too much feet!

Yes, your feet's too big!
Don't want ya 'cause your feet's too big!
Can't use ya 'cause your feet's too big!
I really hate ya 'cause your feet's too big!
Yeah!

Lah-dee-doo-dah
Nah-dah-nah-dah
Where d'ya get 'em?
Nah-dee-ah-dah

Your girl, she likes ya, she thinks you're nice
Got what it takes to be in paradise
She said she likes your face, she likes your rig
But, man, oh, man, them things are too big

Oh, your feet's too big
Don't want ya 'cause your feet's too big!
Mad at ya 'cause your feet's too big
I hate ya 'cause your feet's too big

Spoken:
My goodness, gun the gunboats!
Shift! Shift! Shift!

Oh, your pedal extremities are colossal
To me you look just like a fossil
You got me walkin', talkin' and squawkin'
'Cause your feet's too big, yeah

Spoken:
Come on and walk that thing
Oh, I never heard o' such walkin', Mercy!
You know your pedal extremities really are obnoxious
One never knows, do one?

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Swinging On A Gate


Swinging On A Gate
Composer(s): Harry Hemsley
Performer(s): Harry Hemsley



I wish I was a little boy
But then you see I'm not
I'm very fond of little boys
I know an awful lot
I like the sort of games they play
I think they're really great
But the game that I like playing best
Is swinging on a gate

Swinging on a gate
With a lot of boys
Swinging on the gate
Don't we make a noise
Nurse is very cross
'Cause I come home late
Says I is a naughty girl ("Winnie! Winnie")
For swinging on a gate

Children's Voices:
("Hello - here's a gate")
("Ooh it's a bit like...........isn't it")
("I'm on first")
("No, no, I'm on first")
("Don't push")
("I'm not pushing")
("Now we're off!")

Man's Voice:
("Oi! Get off that gate, do you hear me?")

I don't care much for little girls
They never make a noise
I like to shout and holler out
That's why I'm with the boys
I hold right on climbing trees
And bird-nesting I hate
The game that I like playing best
Is swinging on a gate

Swinging on a gate
With a lot of boys
Swinging on the gate
Don't we make a noise
Nurse is very cross
'Cause I come home late
Says I is a naughty girl ("Winnie! Winnie")
For swinging on a gate

Swinging on a gate
With a lot of boys
Swinging on the gate
Don't we make a noise
Nurse is very cross
'Cause I come home late
Says I is a naughty girl ("Winnie! Winnie")
For swinging on a gate

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Your Eyes Have Told Me So


Your Eyes Have Told Me So
Composer(s): Walter Blaufuss; Gus Kahn; Egbert Van Alstyne
Performer(s): Doris Day;
Buffalo Bills; Dick Haymes; Mario Lanza;
Gordon MacRae; Alfred Piccaver



I saw your eyes, your wonderful eyes
With love light and tenderness feeling
They thrilled me through, they filled me too
With wonderful dreams I am dreaming
No need to speak, no more shall I seek
For my heart has taught me their meaning
And love has come, at last I know
Your eyes have told me so

No need to speak, no more shall I seek
For my heart has taught me their meaning
And love has come, at last I know
Your eyes have told me so

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Swingin' On A Rainbow


Swingin' On A Rainbow
Composer(s): Peter DeAngelis - Robert Marcucci
Performer(s): Frankie Avalon



You've got me swingin' on a rainbow
Walkin' around in the rain
Playin' with the raindrops
I'm doin' flip flops
Look what one kiss can do

You've got me warm in the winter
Cold on a summery day
Never know the reason
Heart's out of season
Look at what one kiss dan do

Never thought that I would fall
Love was not for me
I wanted to be just a roamin' lover
Happy and careless, always to be free

You've got me, hook, line and sinker
Just like a fish on a hook
You better pull the line in
Baby, I can't win
Look what one kiss can do

I only want to just be careless and free
And I never thought that
You would fall in love with me

You've got me, hook, line, and sinker
Just like a fish on a hook
You better pull the line in
Baby, I can't win

I've got it bad
And I feel so glad
Just look what one...
Just look what one...
Just look what one kiss can do

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Your Cheating Heart


Your Cheating Heart
Composer(s): Hank Williams
Performer(s): Hank Williams;
and various other artists



Your cheating heart will make you weep
You'll cry and cry and try to sleep
But sleep won't come the whole night through
Your cheating heart will tell on you

When tears come down like falling rain
You'll toss around and call my name
You'll walk the floor the way i do
Your cheating heart will tell on you

(break)

Your cheating heart will pine some day
And crave the love you threw away
The time will come when you'll be blue
Your cheating heart will tell on you

When tears come down like falling rain
You'll toss around and call my name
You'll walk the floor the way I do
Your cheating heart will tell on you

Your cheating heart is gonna tell on you

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Swingin' Down The Lane


Swingin' Down The Lane
Composer(s): Isham Jones - Gus Kahn
First release by: Isham Jones and His Orch. - 1923
Covered by multiple other artists



Everybody's hand in hand
Swingin' down the lane
Everybody's feelin' grand
Swingin' down the lane

That's the time I miss the bliss
That we might have known
Nights like this
When I'm all alone

When the moon is on the rise
Baby I'm so blue
Watchin' lovers makin' eyes
Like we used to do

When the moon is on the way
Still I'm waitin' all in vain
Should be swingin' down the lane
With you

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Your Bulldog Drinks Champagne


Your Bulldog Drinks Champagne
Composer(s): David Bellamy; Jim Stafford
Performer(s): Jim Stafford



There was a lady in a window
In the room across the way
From the hotel I was staying in
While on my holiday
I couldn't help but see everything
'Cause I was peeping I confess
Still after dinner every night
She had the strangest guest

She'd retire to her favorite chair
And sit there with a dog
Fill the crystal glasses
While the fire danced on the log
I watched them drink their bubbly brew
Until the fire grew dim
Then I stuck my head out the window
And said why not me instead of him

Oh your bulldog drinks champagne
And I ain't one to complain
What a perfect waste of wine it seems to be
So honey, tell ol' rover that the big dog's coming over
'Cause any woman that would get a bulldog drunk
Would have to be good to me

Fourteen days and fourteen nights
Not one word did I hear
Her with her silk and champagne
Over to me in my shorts with a beer
She just left the curtains wide
And I knew she knew I could see
Her and the pug-nosed mutt
Guzzling wine and teasing me

Oh your bulldog drinks champagne
And I ain't one to complain
What a perfect waste of wine it seems to be
So honey, tell ol' rover that the big dog's coming over
'Cause any woman that would get a bulldog drunk
Would have to be good to me

So I made a bolder move
I went over and rang her bell
I heard growling from inside
And I got scared as hell
Then the bulldog staggered out the door
And he said, how do yo do
But the lady bit me on the leg
And I said r-rouf, I love you too

Oh your bulldog drinks champagne
And I ain't one to complain
What a perfect waste of wine it seems to be
So honey, tell ol' rover that the big dog's coming over
'Cause any woman that would get a bulldog drunk
Would have to be good to me

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Swingin'


Swingin'
Composer(s): Lionel Delmore - John Anderson
First release by: John Anderson



There's a little girl in our neighbourhood
Her name is Charlotte Johnson and she's really looking good
I had to go and see her so I called her on the phone
I walked over to her house, and this was going on:
Her brother was on the sofa eating chocolate pie
Her mama was in the kitchen cutting chicken up to fry
Her daddy was in the backyard rolling up a garden hose
I was on the porch with Charlotte feeling love down to my toes

And we were swingin'
Yeah we were swingin'
Little Charlotte she's as pretty as the angels when they sing
I can't beleive it started on her front porch in the swing
Just a swingin'

Now Charlotte is a darling she's the apple of my eye
When I'm on the swing with her it makes me almost high
Now Charlotte is my lover and she has been since the spring
I just can't believe it started on her front porch in the swing
Just a swingin'

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