The Diplomat
Composer(s): Roger Bowling
Performer(s): Johnny Cash



He slowly raised the trembling hand
Gently brushed the silver strand of hair from his wrinkled brow
Lips that used to talk so free 
The eyes that used to beckon me were silent now
He listens to a passin' train 
Gives into an old familiar pain, familiar pain

They retired him twenty years ago gave him a watch made of gold and took his train

His woman's name was Margaret
He loved her but she went away and left his heart undone
He called this train the Diplomat 
She's the only other lady that he ever loved

Some forty years he made the steam
From Memphis down to New Orleans but now he's off the line
And the closest that he ever gets 
To Margaret or the Diplomat is in his mind

He said take me to the station the Diplomat is bringing Margaret home
Can't you hear that whistle blowing they both know I've been alone for much too long
Let's not keep 'em waitin' we'll talk about the good times later on
Right now take me to the station the Diplomat is bringing Margaret home

They say he talks crazy when
He sees the passin' train or when he hears Margaret's name
But the only things he ever loved 
He lost before he loved enough, he's not to blame

So who's to say he's right or wrong
Reachin' out and hangin' on 
To dreams he can't let go
He threw the watch of gold away but keeps tracks of memories where he belongs

He said take me to the station the Diplomat is bringing Margaret home
Can't you hear that whistle blowing they both know I've been alone for much too long
Let's not keep 'em waitin' we'll talk about the good times later on
Right now take me to the station the Diplomat is bringing Margaret home

They retired him twenty years ago gave him a watch made of gold
And took daddy's train

Carrie-Ann
Composer(s): Allan Clarke - Tony Hicks - Graham Nash
First release by: The Hollies - 1967



Hey, Carrie-Anne
Hey, Carrie-Anne
When we were at school, our games were simple
I played a janitor, you played a monitor
Then you played with older boys and prefects
What's the attraction in what they're doing?
Hey, Carrie-Anne, what's your game now?
Can anybody play?
Hey, Carrie-Anne, what's your game now?
Can anybody play?
You were always something special to me
quite independent, never caring
You lost your charm as you were aging
Where is your magic disappearing?
You're so, so like a woman to me (so lke a woman to me)
So, so like a woman to me (like a woman to me)
People live and learn but you're still learning
You use my mind and I'll be your teacher
When the lesson's over, you'll be with me
Then I'll hear the other people saying
Carrie-Anne, Carrie-Anne, Carrie-Anne

Flashlight
Composer(s): John Palumbo; Joey D'Amico; 
Jim Griffiths; Joe Macre; Rick Witkowski
Performer(s): Crack The Sky



She was a true loser
And he was nothing more
They met one another
She showed him her x-rays
He turned on his flashlight of love
She showed him her x-rays
He turned on his flashlight of love 
She loved reading Cosmo
He liked to wax his van
They moved in together
She showed him her x-rays
He turned on his flashlight of love
She showed him her x-rays
He turned on his flashlight of love 

She said it was over
So he found something new
They left one another
She showing her x-rays
He glowing his flashlight of love
She showing her x-rays
He glowing his flashlight of love
She showing her x-rays
He glowing his flashlight of love

The Diet Song
Composer(s): Shel Silverstein
Performer(s): Shel Silverstein
and multiple other artists



Breakfast, black coffee, one slice of dry toast
No butter, no jelly, no jam
Lunch, just some lettuce, two celery stalks
No booze, no potatoes, no ham
Dinner, one chicken wing, broiled not fried
No gravy, no biscuits, no pie
And this dietin' dietin' dietin' dietin'
Sure is a rough way to die

So pass me a carrot stick, peel me a prune
A glass of skim milk and that`s all
Turn off the TV, that Big Mac commercial
It's drivin` me right up the wall
And I`m thinkin` of french fries, sausage and waffles
Spaghetti and cookies and cake
And each night I`m dreamin` of chocolate ice cream
And I`m starvin` to death when I wake

Supper, two pieces of cauliflower raw
Some beefsteak the size of a nail
One sliced tomato, a small dab of slaw
I swear I ate better in jail
Stop eatin' that pizza right under my nose
Girl, that's the least you can do
Put down that candy bar while I`m singin'
I`m starvin' my buns off for you

You`re fixin' the kids all those creamed mashed potatoes
But it's bouillon and water for me
Hey, you got a lock on the refrigerator
Lord knows where you`re hidin' the key
While I`m starvin' for food late at night
I`m starvin' for lovin` from you
But you say that when I can see my own dick
You`ll be glad to look at it too

So pass me a carrot stick, peel me a prune
A glass of skim milk and that's all
You and Jane Fonda and old Richard Simmons
Are drivin` me right up the wall

Now when I am dead with the insurance paid
You`ll look down at me and you`ll grin
You`ll say, "Well, the boy tried and he suffered and died
But don`t he look good when he`s thin", oh my

This dietin' dietin' dietin' dietin'
Sure is a rough way to die

Carrickfergus
(Traditional)
Performer(s): The Dubliners



I wish I was in Carrickfergus
Only for nights in Ballygrand
I would swim over the deepest ocean
Only for nights in Ballygrand

But the sea is wide and I cannot swim over
And neither have I the wings to fly
I wish I had a handsome boatman
To ferry me over, my love and I

Now in Killenny it is reported
On marble stones there as black as ink
With gold and silver I would support her
But I'll sing no more now till I get a drink

'Cause I am drunk today and I'm seldom sober
A handsome rover from town to town
Ah but i'm sick now my days are numbered
Come all you young men and lay me down

Flash, Bang, Wallop!
Composer(s): David Heneker
Performer(s): Tommy Steele; Sammy Davis Jr.



(Smile please, all smile. You too, Sir)
(I am smiling)

All lined up in a wedding group
'Ere we are for a photograph
We're all dressed up in a morning suit
All trying hard not to laugh
Since the early caveman in his fur
Took a trip to Gretna Green
There's always been a photographer
To record the 'appy scene.....

'Old it, flash, bang, wallop, what a picture
What a picture, what a photograph
Poor old soul, blimey, what a joke
Hat blown off in a cloud of smoke
Clap 'ands, stamp yer feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum
What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your fam'ly album

(Thanks very much, one more picture. Hold it!)

The same thing 'appened long ago
When man was in his prime
And what went on we only know
From the snaps he took at the time
When Adam and Eve in their birthday suit
Decided to get wed
As Adam was about to taste the fruit
The man with the cam'ra said.....

'Old it, flash, bang, wallop, what a picture
What a picture, what a photograph
Poor old Eve, there with nothing on
Face all red and 'er fig leaf gone 
Clap 'ands, stamp yer feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum, W-e-e-a-ay!
What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your fam'ly album

(Thanks very much. One more picture, hold it!)

You've read it in a folio
Or seen it in a Shakespeare play
How Juliet fell for Romeo
In the merry month of May
And as 'e climbed the orchard wall
To reach 'is lady fair
As he tumbled, she began to bawl
As he floated through the air.....

'Old it, flash, bang, wallop, what a picture
What a picture, what a photograph
Poor young chap, what a night 'e spent
Tights all torn and 'is rapier bent
Clap 'ands, stamp yer feet
Bangin' on the big bass drum, W-e-e-a-ay!
What a picture, what apicture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your fam'ly album

(One more picture, hold it!)

King 'Enry the Eighth had several wives
Including Anne Boleyn
And he kept an album of their lives
With all their photos in
As Anne Boleyn was on her knees
Dressed in her very best frock
King 'Enry shouted, "Smile, Dear, please"
As 'er 'ead rolled off the block.....

'Old it, flash, bang, wallop, what a picture
What a picture, what a photograph
Comes the print in a little while
Lost 'er 'ead, but she kept 'er smile
Clap 'ands, stamp yer feet, Ye-e-a-y!
Bangin' on the big bass drum
What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your fam'ly album

(Thank you very much. One more picture, hold it!)

When Napoleon married Josephine
There was just the same to-do
He galloped home from the battle scene
All the way from Waterloo
And as he came from orf 'is 'orse
To the boudoir where she sat
She said to 'im, in French of course
As he took of his big cocked 'at

'Old it, flash, bang, wallop, what a picture
What a picture, what a photograph
There she was, with a big Hussar
All caught up in 'er oh-la-la
Clap 'ands, stamp yer feet, Ye-e-a-y!
Bangin' on the big bass drum
What a picture, what a picture
Um-tiddly-um-pum-um-pum-pum
Stick it in your fam'ly album

Stick it in your fam'ly
Stick it in your fam'ly
In your fam'ly album!

The Dick Van Dyke Show Theme Song 
Composer(s): Earle Hagen - Morey Amsterdam
Performer(s): Dick Van Dyke



So you think that you've got troubles? 
Well, trouble's a bubble
So tell old Mr. Trouble to "Get lost!"

Why not hold your head up high and
Stop cryin', start tryin'
And don't forget to keep your fingers crossed 

When you find the joy of livin' 
Is lovin' and givin' 
You'll be there when the winning dice are tossed 

A smile is just a frown that's turned upside down 
So smile, and that frown will defrost
And don't forget to keep your fingers crossed!

Caribbean Amphibian
Composer(s): Mark Salzman
Performer(s): Sesame Street



I know a tropical island
Where the mango moon and banana sun shine 
and on this tropical island 
there lives a cousin of mine

Sometimes he lives in the water
sometimes he lives on the land
sometimes he likes to go sun himself
on soft caribbean sand

He's a caribbean amphibian
He likes to hop in the tropical sea
Caribbean amphibian
a frog in a coconut tree

The flying fish and the turtles
they've seen him hop where the pineapple grows
he likes to see all the islands
so island hopping he goes

Sometimes he hops to Jamaica
sometimes to Haiti he hops
sometimes a warm Peurto Rico beach
is where he finally stops

He's a caribbean amphibian
He likes to hop in the tropical sea
Caribbean amphibian
a frog in a coconut tree

Sometimes he lives in the water
sometimes he lives on the land
sometimes he likes to play music
in an all amphibian band

He's a caribbean amphibian
He likes to hop in the tropical sea
Caribbean amphibian
a frog in a coconut tree

Flash Gordon
Performer(s): Queen



Flash - Ah - Saviour of the universe 
Flash - Ah - He'll save ev'ry one of us 
Seemingly there is no reason for these 
Extraordinary intergalactical upsets (ha ha ha) 
What's happening Flash? 
Only Dr Hans Zarkov formerly at N A S A 
Has provided any explanation 
Flash - Ah - He's a miracle 
This mornings unprecedented solar eclipse 
Is no cause for alarm 
Flash - Ah - King of the impossible 
He's for ev'ry one of us 
Stand for ev'ry one of us 
He'll save with a mighty hand 
Ev'ry man ev'ry woman ev'ry child 
With a mighty Flash 
General Kaka Flash Gordon approaching 
What do you mean Flash Gordon approaching? 
Open fire all weapons 
Dispatch war rocket Ajax to bring back his body 

Flash - Ah 
Gordon's alive 
Flash - Ah - He'll save ev'ry one of us 
Just a man with a man's courage 
He knows nothing but a man 
But he can never fail 
No one but the pure in heart 
May find the golden grail oh oh oh oh 
Flash Flash I love you 
But we only have fourteen hours to save the Earth

The Diary
Composer(s): Neil Sedaka - Howard Greenfield
Performer(s): Neil Sedaka; Walter Wanderley



(Ah, ah, ah, ah) 
(Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh)

How I'd like to look into that little book
The one that has the lock and key
And know the boy that you care for
The boy who's in your diary

When it's late at night what is the name you write?
Oh, what I'd give if I could see
Am I the boy that you care for?
The boy who's in your diary

Do you recall and make note of all
The little things I say and do?
The name you underline, I'm hoping that it's mine
Darling, I'm so in love with you-oo

Please don't leave me blue, make all my dreams come true
You know how much you mean to me
Say I'm the boy that you care for
The boy who's in your di-a-ry

(Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh)
(Whoa-oh-oh-whoo-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
(Whoo-ooh-ooh-ooh)  

Carpet Man
Composer(s): Jimmy Webb
Performer(s): The 5th Dimension
and multiple other artists



When you see some puddles on the ground
You lay down so she don't have to walk around
You think that will protect her from the rain
But you'll never ever stop the pain
She walks all over you 
You know she can, she knows she can 
You're a carpet man, you're a carpet man

You take such care to keep that girl's feet clean
Like she's some kind of figurine
The world's so far below her it's not her scene
And so she uses you to stand between
She walks all over you
You know she can, she knows she can 
You're a carpet man, you're a carpet man

I would think you'd get tired of hurtin' 
Every now and then
It's no good down there that's for certain
And carpets do get thin
And that's when they have to be thrown away 
That's what she'll say to herself some sunny day 
And she'll say come to my wedding and of course you do
And then the groom and her will have a dance on you
She walks all over you 
You know she can, she knows she can 
You're a carpet man, you're a carpet man

Flash Forward
Composer(s): Serge Gainsbourg
Performer(s): Serge Gainsbourg



Un soir qu'à l'improviste chtac
Je frappe à ma porte toc toc

Sans réponse je pousse le loqu
Et j'écoute gémir le hamac
Grincer les ressorts du paddock
J'avance dans le block
Out et mon kodak
Impressionne sur les plaques
Sensibles de mon cerveau une vision de claque
Je sens mon rythme cardiaque
Qui passe brusquement à mach
Deux tic tac tic tac tic tac tic tac
Comme sous un électrochoc
Elle était entre deux macaques
Du genre festival à Woodstock
Et semblait une guitare rock
À deux jacks
L'un à son trou d'obus l'autre à son trou de balle
Crac

Eh doc...
Qui moi paranoïaque?
Demandez donc un peu au vioque
Qui est portier de nuit au Rox
Y Hôtel si je débloque

C'est là à jamais sur le bloc
Notes de ma mémoire black
Sur white et quoique
Je fasse ça me reviendra en flash back
Bordel jusqu'à ce que j'en claque

The Diamantina Drover
Composer(s): Hugh MacDonald
Performer(s): John Williamson
and multiple other artists



The faces in the photograph have faded
And I can't believe he looks so much like me
For it's been ten years today
Since I left for Old Cork Station
Sayin' I won't be back till the drovin's done

For the rain never falls on the dusty Diamantina
And a drover finds it hard to change his mind
For the years have surely gone
Like the drays from Old Cork Sta-ation
And I won't be back till the drovin's done

Well it seems like the sun comes up each mornin'
Sets me up and takes it all away
For the dreaming by the light
Of the camp fire at ni-ight
Ends with the burning by the day

For the rain never falls on the dusty Diamantina
And a drover finds it hard to change his mind
For the years have surely gone
Like the drays from Old Cork Sta-ation
And I won't be back till the drovin's done

Sometimes I think I'll settle back in Sydney
But it's been so long it's hard to change my mind
For the cattle trail goes on and on
And the fences roll forever
And I won't be back till the drovin's done

For the rain never falls on the dusty Diamantina
And a drover finds it hard to change his mind
For the years have surely gone
Like the drays from Old Cork Sta-ation
And I won't be back till the drovin's done

For the rain never falls on the dusty Diamantina
And a drover finds it hard to change his mind
For the years have surely gone
Like the drays from Old Cork Station
And I won't be back till the drovin's done

Carousel
Composer(s): James - Ray Thomas
Performer(s): Ray Thomas



The world's like a big carousel
turning in space with the whole human race hanging on
but the sounds that are played on that penny arcade
turn me on

Then I need a little romance
if you play me that song
then you'll get me to dance
I can dance
sing me a slow song and maybe then I'll take a chance

For there's something in the air
and it's turning spinning
seems like I float everywhere

For there's something in the air
and it's turning spinning
seems like I float everywhere

Oh I need some loving tonight
someone to hold me and make me feel alright tonight
and I can't explain why the whole human race
wants to fight

For the world is a beautiful place
so small but it's all that we have to stand on
you and I
so won't you join me on my carousel in the sky

For there's something in the air
and it's turning spinning
seems like I float everywhere

Flamingos Fly
Composer(s): Van Morrison
Performer(s): Van Morrison; Sammy Hagar



Go for a ride
In the still of the night
And morning brings forth
All this wonderful delight
Couldn't have made it more plain
When I heard that soft refrain
And I heard you gently sigh

Wanna take you where flamingos fly, flamingos fly
Way over yonder in the clear blue sky
That's where flamingos fly

Lie in the dark
With the sound of the nightingale
Listen for a lark
I will tell you a tale
Breeze is blowin', blowin' outside
Wanna take that moonlight ride
When I hear you gently sigh

Wanna take you where flamingos fly, flamingos fly
Way over yonder in the clear blue sky
That's where flamingos fly

Well we're here and we're waiting
For that morning light to shine
And I'm looking at you looking at me looking right back at you
And I'm anticipating
Sounds along the way
Looking at you looking at me looking right back at you, hey

I'll follow the road
That will take me, take me right back home
And carry that load
Where the deer and the provincial angels roam
Happiness touches, touches me now
I know where it came from and how
When I hear you gently sigh

Wanna take you where flamingos fly, flamingos fly
Way over yonder in the clear blue sky
That's where flamingos fly, flamingos fly
Way over the rooftops of the houses
I heard it one time, I heard it one time in a lullaby
I heard it one time, I heard it one time in a lullaby
Somewhere, somewhere, somewhere way over the rooftops of the houses
Heard it one time in a lullaby
Heard it one time, heard it one time in a lullaby

The Devil Went Down To Georgia
Composer(s): Charlie Daniels - Charles Hayward - Tom Crain - Fred Edwards - Taz DiGregorio - James Marshall
First release by: The Charlie Daniels Band - 1979
Covered by multiple other artists



The devil went down to Georgia 
He was looking for a soul to steal 
He was in a bind 
'Cause he was way behind 
And he was willing to make a deal 

When he came upon this young man 
Sawing on a fiddle and plain' it hot 
And the devil jumped 
Up on a hickory stump 
And said boy let me tell you what 

Now you play a pretty good fiddle, boy 
But give the devil his due 
I'll bet a fiddle of gold 
Against your soul 
'Cause I think I'm better than you 

The boy said my name's Johnny 
And it might be a sin 
But I'll take your bet 
And you're gonna regret 
'Cause I'm the best there's ever been 

The devil opened up his case 
And he said I'll start this show 
And fire flew from his fingertips 
As he rosined up his bow 

Then he pulled the bow across the strings 
And it made a [sic] evil hiss 
And a band of demons joined in 
And it sounded something like this 

When the devil finished 
Johnny said well you're pretty good old son 
Just sit right in that chair right there 
And let me show you how it's done 

He played Fire on the Mountain 
Run boys, run 
The devil's in the House of the Rising Sun 
Chicken in a bread pan picking out dough 
Granny does your dog bite 
No child, no 

The devil bowed his head 
Because he knew that he'd been beat 
And he laid that golden fiddle 
On the ground and Johnny's feet 

Johnny said, Devil just come on back 
If you ever want to try again 
I done told you once you son of a bitch 
I'm the best there's ever been 

And he played Fire on the Mountain 
Run boys, run 
The devil's in the House of the Rising Sun 
Chicken in a bread pan picking out dough 
Granny does your dog bite 
No child, no 

Caroline, No
Composer(s): Tony Asher - Brian Wilson
First recording/First release by: Brian Wilson - 1966
Covered by multiple other artists



Where did your long hair go
Where is the girl I used to know
How could you lose that happy glow
Oh, Caroline no

Who took that look away
I remember how you used to say
You'd never change, but that's not true
Oh, Caroline you

Break my heart
I want to go and cry
It's so sad to watch a sweet thing die
Oh, Caroline why

Could I ever find in you again
Things that made me love you so much then
Could we ever bring 'em back once they have gone
Oh, Caroline no

Flamingo
Composer(s): Edmund Anderson; Ted Grouya
Performer(s): Duke Ellington;
and various other artists



Flamingo, like a flame in the sky
Flying over the island
To my lover nearby

Flamingo, with your tropical hue
For it's you I rely on
And the love that is true

The wind sings a song to you as you go
The song that I hear below
The murmuring heart

Flamingo, when the sun meets the sea
Say farewell to my lover
And hasten to me

Aah-ooh, aah-ooh, ooh-ooh
Flamingo....
Flamingo....

Flamingo, when the sun meets the sea
Say farewell to my lover
And hasten to me

Aah-ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-aah

Daisey
Composer(s): Chad Garrett
Performer(s): Pearly Gate



Daisey, where are you growin'?
Are you sowin' some new seed?
Daisey, I can feel you growin' on me

Daisey, beggin' your pardon
I dig your garden of sunshine
Daisey, show me how to make you mine

And if you're willin' to take time, Daisey
You can show me the way, girl
'Cause I know if we make time, Daisey
Every month would be like May

Aaah aaah aaah aaah
Aaah aaah aaah aaah aaah
Aaah aaah aaah aaah
Aaah aaah aaah

And if you're willin; to take time, Daisey
You know you might wanna stay, girl
'Cause I know if we make time, Daisey
Every month would be like May

Daisey, hold on I'm comin'
No need for thumbin' a new ride
Daisey
We can get it on if we try
We can get it on if we try
We can get it on if we try... 

Caroline, Caroline
Composer(s): Louis Benech - Vincent Scotto
Performer(s): André Bourvil; Mireille Ponsard



Voilà huit heures qui sonnent, c'est dimanche coco
Déjà l'soleil rayonne à travers les rideaux
J'ai touché ma quinzaine, si tu le veux tantôt
Nous irons à Vincennes, dîner au bord de l'eau
Vite en bas du lit, passe moi mes habits
Et jetons du jus dans Paris

Caroline, Caroline, mets tes p'tits souliers vernis
Ta robe blanche des dimanches
Et ton grand chapeau fleuri
Caroline, Caroline, t'arrêt' pas comm' ça en ch'min
Marche plus vite, ma petite
Tu vas nous fair' rater l'train

Installons-nous ma chère sur le bord du talus
Mets un journal par terre, on va manger là-d'ssus
Pourquoi qu'tu fais la tête, tu n'as qu'à faire comme moi
Quand on n'a pas d'fourchettes, on mange avec les doigts
T'as fini déjà, ah! quel estomac
Où qu't'as donc fourré tout ça?

Caroline, Caroline, on a tout d'même bien dîné
Plus personne, viens mignonne
C'est l'moment d'aller s'prom'ner
Caroline, Caroline, les p'tits oiseaux font cui-cui
Sur la mousse, fraîche et douce
Moi j'le ferais bien aussi

Mais là-bas il y a la fête, j'entends l'accordéon
Prépare tes gambettes, on va faire un boston
J'cède à tous tes caprices, j'te paie un mirliton
Un cochon d'pain d'épice, ous' qu'il y a mon nom
Tu le mangeras
Quand j'serai pas là
Ça t'fera penser à moi

Caroline, Caroline, relév' ta jupe en dansant
Aie d'l'allure, va en mesure
On s'croirait chez l'Président
Caroline, Caroline, qu'est c'qu'ils ont à nous r'garder
Tu m'fais honte, allons, r'monte
Ton pantalon qu'est tombé

C'est pas d'chance, ma poulette, voilà qu'il tombe de l'eau
Mets ta jupe sur ta tête pour garer ton chapeau
Moi j'te suis par derrière, ta ch'mise dépasse un peu
Mais, grâce à ta bannière, j'te perdrai pas des yeux
Nous v'là arrivés
C'qu'on est éreinté
C'est pas trop tôt d'se reposer

Caroline, Caroline 
Ah! c'qu'on est bien dans son lit
Tu soupires, tu veux rire
Ça c'est pas pour aujourd'hui
Caroline, Caroline, veux-tu bien r'tirer ta main
Pas d'tapage, si t'es sage
Ça s'ra pour dimanche prochain