Helllo K.,

You tell, that you
- are very weak emotionally
- often are out of heart
- often are puzzling about all sort of things
- not have the patience to wait for God
- are very much seeking for affirmation,
and that, whilst it has been so ELSE.

K., I help you to think.
- as for that emotional weakness: you are sure to be a child of God, you took tight the hand of Jesus, for a long time you were very joyful.
But then the counterattack of the devil has come, as was to be expected. And now the main goal for you is to learn know the Lord God better by the trusting, openhearted prayer. Only ask the Lord:
"Dear Lord God...in the name of Jesus....you said yourself:
' Let the weakling say:
I am strong', (Joël 3 v 10).
Lord....I AM emotionally weak. But please make me strong !".
And tell me after some time, how things are with that 'emotional weakness'.

And as for that 'being out of heart'...ask in your prayer to the Lord:
"Lord.....I wander in desert wasteland.
I don't find a way to a city, where I could settle.
I am hungry and thirsty and my life ebbs away. Lord...will you help me with this 'being in the depths'. Can you bring me on a straight way.
O...I want to give thankings to you always".( Psalm 107 v 4- 9)

And as for those other things you wrote, bring everything in prayer to the Lord.
And....don't hurry him, ( Isaiah 28 v 16),
( he who trusts , will never be dismayed)

K....; this was only the beginning of a conversation . I hope I hear again from you".

Greetings
Ger