John Carlisle: This store is the stuff of nuclear dreams |
Detroit Free Press | freep.com
EAST LANSING You can ask Bob Lazar about the uranium for
sale at his store. Feel free to inquire about the infrared death ray he sells,
too. But please dont ask him about the time he spent at Area 51 working on
UFOs.
Lazar is the owner of United Nuclear Scientific Equipment
and Supplies, a mom-and-pop business unlike any other.
Its not like the science supply stores of the old days, which sold chemistry
sets and microscopes for kids. At United Nuclear, you can stock a mad
scientists radioactive dream supplies because the items are either exempt from
government regulations or are below amounts or concentrations considered
dangerous.
Customers are free to go home with radioactive isotopes, rockets or a Van de
Graaff generator that can produce up to 600,000 volts.
You can buy magnets so powerful theyll bore through walls, furniture or even
your body to get at each other.
You can get X-ray components to take X-rays of things around the house. A
photo inside the stores catalog shows how someone used the equipment to get a
glimpse inside their frog.
You can purchase a real death ray, which emits an invisible infrared beam so
powerful that a direct hit will blast right through your goggles and turn your
eye instantly and permanently into charcoal, as the catalog warns. It can cut
steel, shatter glass, burn wood, chip rock and vaporize skin. A small one is
about $600.
And you can get a chunk of uranium that you can hold in your hand as Lazar
did on a recent afternoon, merrily putting a Geiger counter next to it to show
that the rock was indeed radioactive.
Few people in the world ever get to hold it, the 54-year-old said. Its
not going to hurt you, but its radioactive. The things is, thats exactly one
of the things were trying to dispel people have this built-in fear of
uranium. But theres a lot of radioactive stuff in everyones lives.
Yet despite owning a store thats drawn the keen interest of law enforcement,
lunatics and laymen, Lazar is still most notorious for once saying on television
that he helped reverse engineer a real flying saucer in the real Area 51.
I wish I wouldnt have said anything, but its too late for that, he said.
I think I finally came to the conclusion that, you know, that was a really
stupid thing to say. I shouldve kept my mouth shut. Now its impossible to get
away from.
A UFO legend
Lazar always seems to draw attention.
Thirty years ago, he was working at the Los Alamos National Laboratory in New
Mexico, where he said his unusual ideas about physics got him noticed. He was
soon tapped for a new job in a place that he says turned out to be Area 51, the
legendary secret facility where many people are convinced UFOs are housed.
Lazar said he was hired to reverse engineer an alien spacecraft to figure out
its propulsion system. Spoiler alert: They travel by creating gravity and using
it to distort time and space, he said and look exactly like the flying saucers
in the hokey old science-fiction movies.
But he claims he got fired when he brought some friends to the desert to view
the facilitys weekly UFO test flights.
He panicked and feared for his safety, he said, so he gave an interview to a
Las Vegas TV station, recounting everything he said he saw and did at Area 51.
And for that, hes earned a permanent spot in UFO royalty.
Hes since shied away from the flying saucer spotlight and focuses instead on
his unusual retail business.
Easier said than done, though.
To this day, most of the calls coming to the store are from people who
desperately want to reach the real Bob Lazar and ask him what its like to work
on a UFO. He stopped answering the phone long ago.
Lazars wife, Joy White, does the accounting for United Nuclear and sometimes
answers calls, though she, too, now avoids it. There are just too many people a
little too frantically eager to speak to her husband.
Please! I have this serious message for him. I have to talk to him, she
quotes them as saying. Its kind of amusing. The people are generally, um,
interesting.
Trouble calls
Some people do call the store to actually buy something. And some of them are
frightening.
One man kept calling for a certain selection of chemicals, and it dawned on
Lazar that he was trying to synthesize deadly sarin gas. Lazar told the FBI.
They absolutely flipped out, he said. They tapped the phones, installed
cameras and staked out the place, but never got the guy.
Another man was trying to get castor beans to make the poison ricin with
Lazars help. He also showed a fervent interest in anything radioactive. Another
phone call to the feds.
One woman wanted as much radioactive material as she could get to put in her
horses water. Shed read somewhere that it would strengthen his immune system.
Lazar told her it was a misinformed Internet myth.
Oh, youre trying to cover it up, too, she replied.
And a few calls are simply heartbreaking, like the man who was convinced
Lazar had a time machine and begged him to let him use it to go back in time and
save his son, whod died in a car accident. He refused to believe Lazars
denials.
Look, I know you have it, and I know you have to say that over the phone,
Lazar remembered him saying. You know the guy is just so hurt, he wants to do
anything. But God.
His neighbors havent always been understanding, either. He once built a
four-story Van de Graaff generator in his yard a giant, shiny, high-voltage
globe. It was a particle accelerator, he said, matter-of-factly.
Nearby farmers were freaked out. They just think youre trying to
contaminate their farmland or control their animals, he said. I said, I
cannot control your animals, and they said, Well how come theyre all upset
now?
Why uranium?
Above all, though, nothing raises eyebrows like the mention of uranium.
You get people calling up on the phone screaming Are you insane? What if
people buy a bunch of these and make an atomic bomb? he said. Really? So you
think you can buy a bunch of rocks and make an atomic bomb? The first atomic
bomb took the power of a country to make.
But at least his stock sparks peoples interest. The relatively unglamorous
items he also sells chemistry sets, beakers and test tubes just dont sell
well anymore. In an age of video games and the Internet, Lazar said, a simple
home chemistry set doesnt seem as cool to kids as it once did.
You need something like a real death ray to generate some interest.
When I was a kid, everybody had chemistry sets ... what I was hoping to do
with this company is kind of dispel the mystery of science and get people into
it. But it takes bigger things to get their attention, Lazar said.
Then he turned back to the routine things at his store. The clocks on the
wall had just been scrambled by a jolt from the Van de Graaff generator, which
stood right next to the pile of uranium rocks, which the Geiger counter was
hysterically chirping about.